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We dissolve stuck and rewrite patterns. We apply radical playfulness to life (when we feel like it!), embarking on internal adventures (credo of Safety First). We have a fake band called Solved By Cake. We build invisible sanctuaries, invent words and worlds, breathe awe and wonder.

We are not impressed by monsters. Except when we are. We explore the connections between internal territories and surrounding environment to learn what marvelously supportive delicious space feels like, and how to take exquisite care of ourselves. We transform things.* We glow wild.**

* For example: Desire, fear, worry, pain-and-trauma, boundaries, that problematic word which rhymes with flaweductivity.

** Fair warning: Self-fluency has been known to lead to extremely subversive behavior, including treasuring yourself unconditionally, unapologetically taking up space, experiencing outrageously improbable levels of self-acceptance, and general rejoicing in aliveness.


Very Personal Ads #35: all about the bubbles

very personal adsPersonal ads! They’re … personal! Very.

So my itty bitty personal ads made me realize that it’s time to make a regular practice of trying to feel okay asking for stuff.

Even when the asking thing feels weird and conflicted.

Ever since I posted the first one asking my perfect house to find me, which united me with Hoppy House, I have been a fan of the madness that is personal ads.

And now it’s my weekly ritual. Yay, ritual!

Let’s do it.

Thing 1: tiny little miracles

Here’s what I want:

Big forward progress on my Playground project.

And I want it to happen with ease.

I want the right pieces of information to fall into my lap this week.

Ways this could work:

You know? I’m not entirely sure.

It might not even matter.

A connection. A whisper. An introduction. A collaboration of minds.

It just could.

My commitment.

To keep eyes and ears open.

To activate my web of fabulous connections, as my friend Pam says.

To walk on it, sleep on it, dance on it, breathe on it, blow bubbles on it, eat nachos on it, dream on it, laugh on it.

To dance, dance, dance. And then to sit.

Thing 2: questions for my teleclass on Toozday.

Here’s what I want:

I’m teaching my once-a-year freebie class.

The theme is what to do when people throw shoes at us, when we throw shoes at ourselves, and when our definition of a shoe is totally different than someone else’s.

And I would much rather have a super interactive class based on questions from commenter mice than just teach.

But since we get crazy numbers of people on the call, I know a lot of people either won’t feel comfortable asking on the call or just might not get a chance.

So. A solution. Is needed.

Ways this could work:

Maybe we’ll set up a chat room for the call.

Maybe people will go to yesterday’s post and leave questions there (even if they want to leave them anonymously, which is fine).

Maybe a bunch of people will show up with questions.

But what I’d really like is to have a better sense of what my people want to know about so we can start there and take it deeper.

My commitment.

To have fun with this (well, that part is easy — these calls are pretty much always fun).

To appreciate each question for what it is, and try and extrapolate general usefulness that can help different people in a lot of different situations.

To keep a tough subject as lighthearted as possible, while still acknowledging the hard, and the fact that sometimes the hard really sucks.

Thing 3: transitional rituals (birthday rituals)

Here’s what I want:

My birthday is this weekend.

I want to invent some rituals.

Or borrow someone else’s.

It doesn’t really matter. The point is: I would like to spend my weekend marking transitions in meaningful and not-excessively-cheesy ways.

So this needs elements of safety. And reflection. And sovereignty. And goofiness. And wonder. And bubble-blowing. Oh, yes, there will be bubble-blowing.

Ways this could work:

I’m open to suggestions.

I’m also open to getting ideas through Shiva Nata, and having a Shivanautical epiphany or two come up.

And I could ask my Kitchen Table people for ideas.

Something could surprise me. But not a surprise party. Because that sounds hellish.

My commitment.

To not dismiss things too quickly.

To find out what I really want and work on letting that be a legitimate thing to want.

To be full of wonder at the marvel of being alive, here, now.

To blow lots of bubbles.

Progress report on past Very Personal Ads.

Just to update you on what’s happened since last time.

Very interesting, let me tell you.

The first thing I asked for was knowing what the right compromise was.

And not only did I find what I was looking for, I also had a very strong realization this week that compromise was not the right thing.

But I did alter my plan pretty drastically in reaction to situations that came up. So it’s like I wanted A and couldn’t have A. But instead of compromising on A to get B which was kind of like A, I went in a different direction.

And now I’m headed towards Z, which is actually more like what I wanted with A than B could ever give me. But it’s not a compromise.

It’s new ground.

That might not make sense, but it makes sense in my head so bear with me.

The point: it’s interesting that the word ‘compromise’ showed up in a variety of different ways this week, and that I decided against it.

The second thing I asked for was movement and flow on my Playground project, and that is happening in a big way.

And then I asked for costumes, which was awesome because I ended up writing a whole post about it and getting the most genius ideas ever in the comments.

I wore a short skirt and a long jacket to the Bannister (my attorney), and pirate drag for Purim. It was great. Thank you!

Comments. Since I’m already asking …

I am adding to my practice of asking for stuff by being more specific about what I would like to receive in the comments.

Here’s what I want (just leave them in the comments):

  • Your own personal ads, small or large. Things you’ve asked for. Or are asking for. Or would like to ask for. Or updates on last time!

What I would rather not have:

  • Reality theories.
  • Shoulds. As in, “You should be doing it like this” or “That’s not the right way to ask for things — instead it should be like x, y and z”
  • To be judged or psychoanalyzed.
  • Advices.

My commitment.

I am committing to getting better at asking for things even when asking feels weird.

Thanks for doing this with me!

31 Responses to Very Personal Ads #35: all about the bubbles

  1. Leocadia says:

    I have figured out that I have difficulties with the VPAs. Maybe it is too much asking for a week or a week is too short for the things I ask for. So I am stretching it over the month. And in the form of a letter that I wrote during a train ride yesterday.

    Dear month of March,
    You are a month of transition and transformation. From winter to spring, from darker days to lighter days, from cold to warmth – all these changes announcing a new state of awakening. Every year all these massive transformations seem to happen somewhat subtly and effortlessly, but I know that you need a lot of invisible power and energy to make them happen.
    I am asking you to let me participate in that transformative flow so that I can grow equally gracefully with and into all the things that I need to deal with this month, those I already know of and those that will come up. I am aware that occasional temporary setbacks can occur in the process, so I promise not to nag but to be patient.
    I am not asking for blossoms, little tiny buds will do perfectly and you can guide me how to bring them out. But I am asking to share your innate certainty that the buds will eventually turn into blossoms, some in April, some over the summer, some even later.
    And I promise to receive every warming ray of sunshine, every chirp of a bird, every mild breeze, and every other little sign that heralds spring with great joy and with reverence for your capacity to bring it about.

  2. Suzyn says:

    My birthday ritual, which I do every year, is to grab my journal and take a really long view at “where I am right now.” Job, family, living arrangements, what I’m thinking about, what I’m dreaming about. As many aspects of “me” as I can write down. It’s a little like planting a flag in this day – here’s where I am. I’ve been doing it for at least 15 years. Someday I think it’ll be interesting to look back over all of them!
    .-= Suzyn´s last post … KnitPicks Staff Picks Knit It Together =-.

  3. Heather Freeman
    Twitter: livingartist

    If you set up a chat room for the class, that would allow those of us who are hard of hearing or deaf to participate. I’d really, really like that!
    .-= Heather Freeman´s last post … Bonus Sunday Post: Too many projects?! =-.

  4. Briana
    Twitter: brianaaldrich

    All I know is that I want to work at a playground, metaphorical or otherwise. And the compromise thing is so interesting – I keep noticing places where I think some change will require compromise and then the new way ends up being better than the old way in every respect with no compromise required. If that makes any sense.

    Update on last time: I wanted to incorporate some movement into my morning routine and, yay, it worked – I hiked 6 mornings this week, Hooray for VPA-induced intention.

    What I want:
    A name for a new baby chickadee businessey idea. That is kinda huge so the name needs to be accordingly astonishingly terrific.

    Ways it could come:
    I have a feeling the name will be cryptic or metaphorical, and not something I can just think up analytically. So… Dance of Shiva? I could dream about it. I’m totally open.

    My commitment:
    To give it time and space to percolate. To follow each little thread of idea, however lame it seems, in case it leads to The. Right. Thing.
    .-= Briana´s last post … Of course this hero’s saga stuff is hard. It’s supposed to be. =-.

  5. LaShae "ItyBytes" Dorsey
    Twitter: LaShaeDorsey

    I have no VPA – that I can share publicaly but I’d like to wish you the happiest of happys and the joyfulness of joy and the bubbliest of bubbles.

    (I had a birfday this weekend too and it was all good – Greek food, Great friends).

    Here’s Cheers? to the end of February!!!!

  6. chicsinger simone
    Twitter: simonebernhard

    Happiest of happy birthdays to You, Miss Fabulous Awesome Havi! Don’t forget the tiara.

    @Leocadia Beautiful, I want that too!! I am kind of on the same boat about weekly VPAs, so this is perfect. I plan to write my own March VPA soon. Thanks for the idea!

    Re: teleclass, I am really looking forward to it. I have been thinking a lot lately about Harriet the Spy, so I am hoping to hear more about habit investigation. Yay, teleclass! Twitter works for instant feedback too.

    I am typing this in full expectation of it NOT posting, been having trouble with that on several blogs lately.
    So universe, one little VPA, can I please be able to post on blogs without it disappearing into the mysterious series of tubes? Thanks in advance!

    .-= chicsinger simone´s last post … Monster negotiations =-.

  7. chicsinger simone
    Twitter: simonebernhard

    Happiest of happy birthdays to You, Miss Fabulous Awesome Havi! Don’t forget the tiara.

    @Leocadia Beautiful, I want that too!! I am kind of on the same boat about weekly VPAs, so this is perfect.

    Re: teleclass, I am really looking forward to it. I have been thinking a lot lately about Harriet the Spy, so I am hoping to hear more about habit investigation. Yay, teleclass! Twitter works for instant feedback too.

    I am typing this in full expectation of it NOT posting, been having trouble with that on several blogs lately.
    So universe, one little VPA, can I please be able to post on blogs without it disappearing into the mysterious series of tubes? Thanks in advance!


  8. chicsinger simone
    Twitter: simonebernhard

    wow, thanks universe, that was fast! Seems to have to do with not using a tiny URL in the website slot. Lesson learned!
    .-= chicsinger simone´s last post … Monster negotiations =-.

  9. Havi Brooks
    Twitter: havi

    Yay personal ads!

    @Simone – wow, it didn’t even need a week. :)

    @LaShae – happy birfday sweetie. I hope it was marvelous. hug from me and a kiss from selma.

    @Briana – hiking! without compromises!

    So happy to have people to Very Personal Ad with. You guys are the best.

    I might try a monthly one too — seems like a very useful experiment. Off to scribble!

  10. Patty K
    Twitter: PattyK_

    Happy birthday, Havi! Looking forward to hearing suggestions for birthday rituals. I’m in the market to replace “drink myself unconscious as I mourn getting older” with something a bit more upbeat. And less hangovery.
    .-= Patty K´s last post … Announcing my intention, asking for what I want and doing it all wrong =-.

  11. Gracie says:

    I’m rather a new lurker and have been delighted with the sense of pirate-y joy and putting the hard in its rightful place. It’s all very helpful and fresh, and so I thank you for all of this. You’re in my bookmarks now. :)

    Re: Compromise. First, a disclaimer: Now this is not “advices” or “you’re doing this wrong.” I think everything you’re doing is brilliant. But I’d like to share this because it has actually helped me. That’s all.

    Florence Scovel Shinn was a “New Thought” writer back in the ’40s, and her info is really good for being so… old. She says when we ask for what we want, we need to give the Divine (and fairy godmothers) plenty of room to work. So say you find a particular thing you really, really want, but maybe it belongs to someone else, or some other smelly situation is keeping it from you. This isn’t the time to despair. Or give up. Or compromise.

    Instead, you say to the Divine (or your fairy godmother) something along the lines of, “My source is the Divine, and I can never lose WHAT IS ALREADY MINE. Therefore, I am asking for this thing, or its equivalent (read: Something Even Better) to come to me under grace, in alignment with the Divine Will for the good of all.”

    No compromise required AT ALL. You get exactly what you need in a way that supports everyone involved in the best way possible.

    So happy birthday, Havi. And here’s to the playground and all the bubble-blowing. Oh, and may March be INFINITELY BETTER than February for everyone.

  12. Tami
    Twitter: tamihackbarth

    happy birthday fellow pisces fish! i look forward to hearing about your new rituals.

    one of the best parts of being a teacher is always getting kids in on the b-day action. they love the singing and the b-day wishing. sometimes they even want to hug and eat treats. it’s like being in elementary school all over again. in the best way ever. i highly recommend it.

    my vpa:
    ease from recent onset of crazy/marble-losing/depression + cold/flu.

    how this could happen:
    day or 2 off work (done!)
    contact with my doctor via email to set the stage for our eventual meeting (her damn illness made her cancel my appt today)
    contact with counselor via email to set parameters of our next meeting to lessen the feelings of judgment (from either of us)
    reaching out to friends near and far

    my commitment:
    accepting comfort and help from said friends
    let go of guilt about taking time off from work to care for myself.
    be honest with doctor about what is going on and don’t worry about being a “good patient”
    .-= Tami´s last post … Yoga+Music365 (day55) – Outer South by Conor Oberst and the Mystic Valley Band – The Negatron Edition =-.

  13. Hiro Boga
    Twitter: HiroBoga

    Bubbles are a-bubbling everywhere… My blog post this morning was about blowing bubbles! :-)

    Your birthday is the most important day of your year…it’s the day you chose to incarnate. What a blessing, and a celebration!

    Since my family is Zoroastrian, as children we celebrated our birthdays twice each year–once on the Julian calendar date, and again on date according to the Zoroastrian calendar.

    On my birthday, I’m the queen of my day. As a kid: milk-and-rose-petal bath in the morning. All new clothing, from underwear to shoes. House decorated with garlands of flowers in every doorway. An elaborate ceremony involving more flower garlands, coconuts, rock sugar, rosewater and sandalwood. Also, presents! :-)

    Now, my birthday ritual includes a whole day of no agendas and no time constraints. Those spiritual beings who are my closest allies show up to celebrate with me, to review where I’ve been and help me illumine the path ahead. Later that week, I celebrate with my sons and family, and with friends.

    Wishing you a luscious, beautiful, joyful celebration on your birthday, Havi!

    Love to all,

    .-= Hiro Boga´s last post … Blowing Bubbles, Exploding Patterns, and the Myth of Stuck =-.

  14. Kylie
    Twitter: kyliewriteshere

    Happy Day of Havi! I like to have kid-like fun on my birthday. I like to make a big deal of it without any qualms. Sometimes this takes the form of going to a yoga class that I would never pay for on a normal day, or getting a group together for a hike, or making a fanciful indoor picnic.

    My Very Personal Ad:
    Clarity around how to create a side-business out of my writing and photography.

    How this could work:
    -Suggestions from friends (both virtual and face-to-face) about what they see in my photos that could develop into something larger.
    -Time for me to sit down and brainstorm with myself and my journal.
    -Sitting with it. Drawing on it. And, clearly, writing and taking pictures on it.

    My commitment:
    To maintain quiet focus time each morning. To value the suggestions people have given me and the notes I’ve jotted down by reviewing them and molding them into ideas. To know when it’s time to actually get started and allow mistakes to just be.
    .-= Kylie´s last post … seize the (snow) day =-.

  15. Michelle Marlahan
    Twitter: lovewastingtime

    wow, hiro’s birthday celebration sounds amazing! i’m bummed that i have to wait 11 months for mine again!!

    havi, may your birthday celebration include remembering how wonderful and brilliant you are. may it include all the things you love. and roller derby.

    looking forward to the class tomorrow. will bring or post questions!!!

    my vpa:
    ease in transitioning back into teaching this week

    classes just mysteriously go really well
    i’m prepared and open

    planning but not obsessing
    resting as necessary
    going for a walk or something else that reminds me of the many other aspects of fun
    to have fun in class
    lots of permission

    .-= Michelle Marlahan´s last post … I might have to kill Bubby =-.

  16. Chen Shapira
    Twitter: gwenshap

    My VPA:

    There is this thing I really want. Or maybe don’t want. It is a new and scary thing. In any case, I set things in motion and at this point there is little I can do about this thing except wait for few weeks.

    I want that voice in my head that keeps chatting about the thing to shut up for the duration of those weeks. Yes, I know the thing it awesome. Yes, I know it is scary as hell. Yes I want it badly and yet it could still suck. I heard ya the first time. Nothing I can do about it now and your endless chatter prevents me from being in the moment and doing the things I can do.

    How this can happen:
    I will be aware of when this voice resumes the chatter. I will take a moment to acknowledge that part of me. Then I will take five deep breathes and remind it that it is not useful right now.
    .-= Chen Shapira´s last post … Mapping the NoSQL space =-.

  17. Rose
    Twitter: celestialrose

    My VPA:

    Here’s what I want:
    I want to do well in my degree this year (and next) and to have a pleasant and easy transition into third year; doing projects and courses I love.
    I want the right pieces of information to fall into my lap this week, the right signs to jump out at me and I want to have a weekend of calm. I want to make the right choices in the next two weeks; to have my paperwork accepted and to get the choices which are right for me.

    Ways this could work:
    Some conversation, some silence; songs and lyrics or chants and mantras; through meditation or creative journalling, blog-writing or reading.
    It just works.

    My commitment:
    To keep open-minded and keep faith.
    To breathe and to give myself space from worry. To sing and to dance. To meditate. And to sleep.
    .-= Rose´s last post … Integration =-.

  18. Juliet
    Twitter: julietk

    My VPA for this week was going to be dog-housetraining-related, but I THINK we may have had an important breakthrough on that this afternoon. However, I will remind myself of the important things I can do to make sure this carries on being OK:
    – I will carry on being patient with the dog, who *wants* to do the right thing. I just need to figure out how to communicate that to her, and how to help her feel safe enough to do it.
    – I will remember that both she & I are learning here, and mistakes are OK.

    My other VPA is about my writing: making it *better*. What does that mean to me? Finding my voice. Being clearer about what it is I want to say. Getting better at saying that such that other people enjoy reading it. Creating writing that resonates.

    My commitment: keep on writing. Keep on rewriting. Try out some of the exercises I occasionally come across. Learn about my craft; don’t just assume that I can make it happen.

    My other commitment: start putting my work out there publicly. (There’s some caveats around that; but I do want to do it soon.)
    .-= Juliet´s last post … linky linky =-.

  19. Peg
    Twitter: mogland

    Happy birthday Havi!


    What I want:
    The *thing* that I’ve been hoping for is so very close. And there is an ultimate thing that is *thing* times ten that I find out about this week. I really want it to just be handed to me. In a lovely and easy way.
    Ways this could work:
    Well, it could just happen. In a conversation. I don’t know how else. But I’m open.
    My commitment:
    To stay positive. To not believe in *jinxing* myself by hoping. To take care of myself and keep up with my lovely rituals.

    Another VPA!

    What I want:
    Well, I am doing something difficult and I am trying to do it in the kindest way with the most integrity possible. I want to continue to do the right thing and not necessarily the easy thing (but if it’s easy, that’s even better!).
    Ways this could work:
    It could just flow through me without stress. I don’t know. Perhaps magic?
    My commitment:
    I will keep perspective by taking care of myself. I will take the quiet time I need & honour my Self by listening & hearing.

    And I’d like to really thank you Havi for writing about HSP – just when I get cocky and think I know all there is to know about myself… (ha)
    Perhaps a scotch ritual on your birthday? Out of a pirate hat? Or boot?

  20. Emily
    Twitter: emilyroots

    My VPA: It’s not ’til September, but I would like to remember Hiro’s birthday rituals–old and new. Because that sounds wonderful!

    OK. More seriously. A VPA: I would like the current weird transitiony period to go smoothly. Or as smoothly as possible. Please, no freakouts from anyone. Please.

    Ways this could work: I can relax and let the universe do its thing. I can offer more help than I think is needed, just in case. I can continually reassure those prone to freakout. I can remember that self-care is also critical right now, and that if I forgo self-care, this transitiony thing will backfire in bad weird ways.

    My commitment: Keep on with the walking at lunchtime like I did today. A break made a difference. Let what will be be. Try not to be pushy with the new fellow. I don’t want to be a button-pusher, but I’m also worried.
    .-= Emily´s last post … Creative Every Day, Part 9 =-.

  21. Deanna
    Twitter: DeannaLohnes

    Awesome-est update EVER! When last we VPA’d together I asked for hall of justice superheroes for thing 1. Thing 1 not only got a needed copy editor, but a copy editor with A CAPE. The universe is the funniest thing. I can’t believe I need to write a VPA to remember that I have a friend who is a professional editor and owns A CAPE. With her initials on it.

    My ask for this week:
    I started a transition period today. I’m free and super excited, but scared half witless. I need to know the next right move. Is this the big transition into my beach shack? Or is it some kind of stepping stone transition?

    Ways this could work:
    I’m not clear yet on what “it” is, so I don’t know how to make it work. I’m honestly lost.

    My commitment:
    To stay open. If A won’t work look for Z. Don’t settle for B before exploring Y.
    To be good to my body until things settle down. More exercise, less sugar, more breathing, less gluten, more quality time, less drinking
    To lean on support people when I need to and ASK for help.

    Happy Birthday Havi!! I hope your birthday has a cape….
    .-= Deanna´s last post … Breakdown, Breakthrough, March First Forward =-.

  22. PQR says:

    My Very Personal Ad:
    I would really, really, really like to get over what my dad did to me and my family. I want the migraines, muscle spasms and nausea that come up whenever I have to deal with him to fade away. I want to be able to face him easily and calmly and securely. I want to be the strong woman I can see on the other side of this hurt.

    How this could work:
    Maybe I need to find a treasure map.
    Maybe I need to find a good navigator to help me through these waters, either a professional or someone spiritual I trust.
    Maybe I need to steal time to spend with these feelings, stop denying they exist and finally learn what they are trying to teach me.
    Maybe I need to look at the pile of shoes around me and examine each one individually. Or maybe I just need to hoist them overboard, tied in a sail with an anchor attached.

    My commitment:
    To lookout for treasure maps, whatever form they may take.
    To be open to finding a good navigator.
    To give myself permission without judgement to be weak, open, hurting and vulnerable while doing this.
    To steal time and a safe cabinspace in which to face this, and not stow it away again.
    To remember that this will not last forever even if it hurts now.
    To find time to laugh and enjoy my life, because I have so much to celebrate in it that is not this hurt.

  23. Meg
    Twitter: MegBoone

    The Fluent Self is fast becoming my must read in my inbox and then I can’t help myself but read all the comments (b/c you are all fantabulous, shut up it’s a word)

    VPA: Woman seeks smooth transitions in a smooth sailing sun on her face kind of way. Which means she will enjoy said transitions instead of having panic attacks or hissy fits about them.

    Found it interesting that so many are worried about our transitions so I edit my VPA to include all of you. Good luck and smooth sailing to all!

    Speaking of transitions. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Havi!!! Not advice but a moment of inspiration reading your post ( I am going to do this as soon as I can, it’s dark out right now so I will wait til it is light out, but I am pouting about having to wait) Blow your bubbles and when you do blow one for each year of your life (so far) and of course one to grow on while envisioning a VPA inside each of them floating off directly to the source or fairy god mother if you will (love that idea) And of course yours get special treatment b/c it’s your Birthday!
    So to happy Birthday wishes and very floaty bubbles
    .-= Meg´s last post … SOFT-LAUNCH 5weeks!!! =-.

  24. Bonni says:

    Birthday rituals, OK . . . So: at the office, when I notice it’s someone’s birthday, I go wish them a happy birthday. I also ask them if they are doing anything cool for their birthday. So far, overwhelmingly:

    –almost all of the men say “Oh, we’re going out to dinner tonight.”
    –almost all of the women say “Oh, I’m not going to be doing anything special tonight, but later on//this weekend//next weekend we’ll go out to dinner.”

    This pattern freaks me out — I can’t figure it out — and at the same time I find it super-interesting.

    Note: I would have never even thought to look for a pattern like this, it’s just that it kept showing up!!

    So if it appeals to you, part of the ritual could be to wait a few days and then go do something fun — OR, ritualistically buck the trend (dammit) and do something cool on the day itself!!

  25. Kathleen Avins
    Twitter: spiralsongkat

    I’m really looking forward to tomorrow’s call!

    Here’s my VPA…

    Wanted: Songs that would like to be written by me. I love you and long for you. I can hardly wait to share you with the world!

    How this can happen: I’m sure I’ve heard you whispering to me as I’ve sat with my guitar or piano. Can you come a little bit closer? I’m listening! Or perhaps you’d like to visit me in dreams. Or would you rather come along for a drive with me? I spend a lot of time in my car, and I’d love your company. Let’s be friends!

    My commitment: I will set aside at least fifteen minutes every day to sit in my studio and create a peaceful, playful space into which you may choose to enter. I will carry a journal with me, ready to hold you and keep you safe. You also will have my complete permission to begin as bumbling, toddling, adorable baby songs. You don’t have to be perfect right away, I promise. Let’s grow together!
    .-= Kathleen Avins´s last post … This probably shouldn’t surprise me… =-.

  26. Colleen Wainwright
    Twitter: communicatrix

    Oh, dear. Why was this week so off-kilter from the start? Was it b/c I neglected to visit the shrine of the Vee-Pee-Ay on Sunday (or today, or whenever this posted)?

    Well. An update:

    I got amazing, supercalifragilisticexpialidocious help with my Big Scary Debut last Thursday. Better than expected, than dreamed of. Many good things to come from it. So THANK YOU fairies and angels and pirates. Yar!

    Now. This week’s VPA. So hard. Never in recent years (“recent” being five) have I needed such help. But I have faith! So. Here we go:

    What I want: Some guidance on getting everyone through the Horrible Thing we’re going through.

    Ways it could work: Miracles. Pirate or fairy intervention. A very, very good friend. Spirits of the better dead people from my family. A brilliant flash. I’m open. Seriously. I’m open and on my knees, because I am not sure I can take another week of this.

    My commitment: To take another week of this. To keep myself strong, but to keep my heart soft. To maybe-possibly literally get on my knees for the first time in a long time. I’m not proud; I just want this moved forward. Oh: and a last thing/first thing, too, where I think of it last thing and wake up with it first thing and always always have pen and paper at the ready.
    .-= Colleen Wainwright´s last post … Anatomy of a breakthrough =-.

  27. Faith
    Twitter: faithhelma

    When I turned 30 two years ago, I was on the road with my friend Liz and she had the greatest birthday ritual: you get a wish for however many years old you are. Big or small, simple or fabulous… whatever you wish, the people around you make happen.

    So if we passed a BBQ joint I could impulsively call out, “I would like a pulled pork sandwich!” and Liz would pull over and we would eat there.

    It was ridiculous and childlike and fun, and a great way to celebrate. So I highly recommend it. The only thing is you have to tell all your friends so they can help make your wishes happen.

    Happy birthday!

    And my VPA for March is: I would love a fun, exciting part time job to appear, one that’s so right it doesn’t even seem like a job, it’s just a great way to spend my time with great people and great learning, and it also happens to involve being paid.

  28. Kirsty Hall
    Twitter: kirstymhall

    My VPA:

    I want my ‘Diary Project’ art work to be shown in a gallery. The Diary Project is 365 envelopes with drawings on the outside and secrets inside. It’s a cool project & it’s time for the second part (where people get to open the envelopes to reveal the secrets) to happen but I can’t do it by myself, I need help making it happen.

    How This Could Happen:
    I could just throw it out there to the Universe and trust
    I could ask around
    I could identify the right galleries and send applications in

    My Commitment
    I will mention it on Twitter & on my blog and see if I get any leads
    I will explore my resistance to making the second part of this project happen
    .-= Kirsty Hall´s last post … Goodbye Pepper, Hello Colette =-.

  29. Havi Brooks
    Twitter: havi

    Oh these are all completely wonderful. Hooray for the VPA!

    @Heather – we will definitely have a chat room then. I don’t know if it will help with the flow or not but at least it’s another place for interaction.

    @Deanna – a CAPE! No. Way. That is ridiculously great. I can’t even tell you how happy I am to know that.

    @everyone – oh you guys you guys thank you for all the birthday ritual ideas, this is absolutely brilliant. mwah!

  30. jessie
    Twitter: roomtosmile

    a perfect day for a vpa!

    dear teaching,
    i am really looking for some light and ease in these dark days of march. i love my kids. even when they come in the form of dirty-minded 9th grade boys and 7th graders who can’t control their pen-twirling, i love them, and yet i come home from work these days dark-minded and frustrated. i don’t know what i’m doing wrong, and that’s where some light would come in. i want love and light to enter my classroom–joy in my students and ease in my work. some insight into my patterns about what i think they should be doing—>snapping when it isn’t being done immediately–>frustration would be helpful, too, i think.

    this could look like: being more relaxed in the classroom. jumping to negative conclusions less easily. smiling more. more student-led classes. a gentler me. i would really love to be gentler in these weeks before break.

    my commitment: i could see my way clear to waiting a moment before i tried to yell (i don’t yell, but by golly i snapped at some 7th graders today. gah.). it could mean being less sure about what i had to see from my students. or maybe just being easier on myself about what results i have to see each day.

    dear 7th graders,
    i GET that you are in 7th grade. i am your teacher because i LOVE you no matter what state of advanced weirdness you are in. but PLEASE, i need your help and cooperation in the classroom. if you could please see your way clear to being helpful, that would be AWESOME.

    how this could work: i’d love to find language that seems to GET into their sweet but admittedly mutating little brains to talk to them about mutual responsibility. Ideas WELCOMED. i could also take a moment in time before i jump down their throats about anything. i could be more mirroring of what i’d like to see.

    my commitment: gah. this is hard, because i feel like i DO so much. maybe a commitment to pausing one second a few times per class? and see what happens? be open to the idea that something positive might happen?

  31. jessie
    Twitter: roomtosmile

    oh! and rituals! how about building/ drawing/ collaging a Museum of Things to Honor? about you and your life? what you’re able to do, what you’ve learned? you could have an opening exhibit, if you wanted. with bubbles. and sparkly cider. and people can add exhibits if they want.

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