very personal adsPersonal ads! They’re … personal! Very.

So my itty bitty personal ads made me realize that it’s time to make a regular practice of trying to feel okay asking for stuff.

Even when the asking thing feels weird and conflicted.

Ever since I posted the first one asking my perfect house to find me, which united me with Hoppy House, I have been a fan of the madness that is personal ads.

And now it’s my weekly ritual. Yay, ritual!

Let’s do it.

Thing 1: tiny little miracles

Here’s what I want:

Big forward progress on my Playground project.

And I want it to happen with ease.

I want the right pieces of information to fall into my lap this week.

Ways this could work:

You know? I’m not entirely sure.

It might not even matter.

A connection. A whisper. An introduction. A collaboration of minds.

It just could.

My commitment.

To keep eyes and ears open.

To activate my web of fabulous connections, as my friend Pam says.

To walk on it, sleep on it, dance on it, breathe on it, blow bubbles on it, eat nachos on it, dream on it, laugh on it.

To dance, dance, dance. And then to sit.

Thing 2: questions for my teleclass on Toozday.

Here’s what I want:

I’m teaching my once-a-year freebie class.

The theme is what to do when people throw shoes at us, when we throw shoes at ourselves, and when our definition of a shoe is totally different than someone else’s.

And I would much rather have a super interactive class based on questions from commenter mice than just teach.

But since we get crazy numbers of people on the call, I know a lot of people either won’t feel comfortable asking on the call or just might not get a chance.

So. A solution. Is needed.

Ways this could work:

Maybe we’ll set up a chat room for the call.

Maybe people will go to yesterday’s post and leave questions there (even if they want to leave them anonymously, which is fine).

Maybe a bunch of people will show up with questions.

But what I’d really like is to have a better sense of what my people want to know about so we can start there and take it deeper.

My commitment.

To have fun with this (well, that part is easy — these calls are pretty much always fun).

To appreciate each question for what it is, and try and extrapolate general usefulness that can help different people in a lot of different situations.

To keep a tough subject as lighthearted as possible, while still acknowledging the hard, and the fact that sometimes the hard really sucks.

Thing 3: transitional rituals (birthday rituals)

Here’s what I want:

My birthday is this weekend.

I want to invent some rituals.

Or borrow someone else’s.

It doesn’t really matter. The point is: I would like to spend my weekend marking transitions in meaningful and not-excessively-cheesy ways.

So this needs elements of safety. And reflection. And sovereignty. And goofiness. And wonder. And bubble-blowing. Oh, yes, there will be bubble-blowing.

Ways this could work:

I’m open to suggestions.

I’m also open to getting ideas through Shiva Nata, and having a Shivanautical epiphany or two come up.

And I could ask my Kitchen Table people for ideas.

Something could surprise me. But not a surprise party. Because that sounds hellish.

My commitment.

To not dismiss things too quickly.

To find out what I really want and work on letting that be a legitimate thing to want.

To be full of wonder at the marvel of being alive, here, now.

To blow lots of bubbles.

Progress report on past Very Personal Ads.

Just to update you on what’s happened since last time.

Very interesting, let me tell you.

The first thing I asked for was knowing what the right compromise was.

And not only did I find what I was looking for, I also had a very strong realization this week that compromise was not the right thing.

But I did alter my plan pretty drastically in reaction to situations that came up. So it’s like I wanted A and couldn’t have A. But instead of compromising on A to get B which was kind of like A, I went in a different direction.

And now I’m headed towards Z, which is actually more like what I wanted with A than B could ever give me. But it’s not a compromise.

It’s new ground.

That might not make sense, but it makes sense in my head so bear with me.

The point: it’s interesting that the word ‘compromise’ showed up in a variety of different ways this week, and that I decided against it.

The second thing I asked for was movement and flow on my Playground project, and that is happening in a big way.

And then I asked for costumes, which was awesome because I ended up writing a whole post about it and getting the most genius ideas ever in the comments.

I wore a short skirt and a long jacket to the Bannister (my attorney), and pirate drag for Purim. It was great. Thank you!

Comments. Since I’m already asking …

I am adding to my practice of asking for stuff by being more specific about what I would like to receive in the comments.

Here’s what I want (just leave them in the comments):

  • Your own personal ads, small or large. Things you’ve asked for. Or are asking for. Or would like to ask for. Or updates on last time!

What I would rather not have:

  • Reality theories.
  • Shoulds. As in, “You should be doing it like this” or “That’s not the right way to ask for things — instead it should be like x, y and z”
  • To be judged or psychoanalyzed.
  • Advices.

My commitment.

I am committing to getting better at asking for things even when asking feels weird.

Thanks for doing this with me!