Friday chickenBecause it’s Friday AGAIN. And because traditions are important. In which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of self-reflection.

And you get to join in if you feel like it.

Selma and I have been away all week (wait, we still are away, how weird is that), teaching my Destuckification Retreat in Monterey, California.

So my entire chicken is pretty much about that, since that’s what I’ve been doing.

The hard stuff

Being away from you guys.

I seriously missed hanging out on the blog with you.

Though I did some peeking and reading of comments on my phone. Thank you for all the love and the support and the spaciousness this week, and especially for all the tea you made for me yesterday.

Time going by way too quickly.

Too many things I wanted to do.

So many people I wanted to spend time with.

It was just zooooooooom gone.

Missing old routines, getting new ones, now saying goodbye to the new ones. Sigh.

First I missed all my wacky morning rituals and things that didn’t seem to work while on holiday.

But now I’m all sad about not having a group of people to do Shiva Nata on the beach with and Old Turkish Lady yoga with.


How can Retreat be over? I want to stay on retreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeat.

Basically, change = challenging right now. Is all I’m saying.

I missed my bed.

And my red flannel sheets.

And my gentleman friend’s cooking.

And Hoppy House! Oh Hoppy House!

Some adjustments of expectations combined with patterns of disappointment.

So everything about the retreat has been amazing.

And at the same time there were minor disappointments about the place itself.

The food … sometimes good and occasionally terrific but definitely not what we were promised. Double beds in the single rooms. Little things.

Which triggered my momma hen stuff around wanting to make sure everyone was being taken care of. So that needed some attention.

The good stuff

The place.

The Pacific ocean being right there.

Long walks on the beach.

Baby deer everywhere.

The enormous sky. The stars. The trees. It was a great setting for what we were there to do.

The people.


I don’t even know what to say other than that I genuinely adore every single person who was there and am filled with so much love for them.

So much smart. So much funny. So much goofy. So much real. So much ridiculous. So much kind-heartedness. And caring. And quietly exuberant.

Just an amazing group of human beings who were exceptionally fun to play with and really were up for whatever I threw at them.

Mad Dance of Shiva, inappropriate Shivanauttery and crazy transformative stuff.

We did so much Shiva Nata, in so many different ways.

To The Clash.

On the beach.

Level 4.

In circles and in squares.

In groups and on our own.

To music and in silence.

With laughter and tears and playfulness and grace. It was absolutely incredible.

The goofing off.

Was exquisite.

No one goofs off like my people. This is quality goofing off I’m talking about here. High-level hilarity.

We danced like trolls at a trance party. We made ridiculously silly noises. We did Dance of Shiva to the Beastie Boys.

There was the hilarious Ironic Aerobics class. And a Dork Dancing Extravaganza featuring exceptionally bad break dancing.

We laughed until we cried. Until our muscles ached.

There was so much playing. It was like being six again. And it was brilliant.

Weird epiphanies.

All sorts of unexpected bits and pieces.

The love.

Seriously intense. Like, you are in a room and that room is full of love.

Very, very cool.

Getting to come back from retreat despite being sad about the ending.

Looking forward to my routines.

And my rituals. And writing. And being here on the blog.

And … playing live at the meme beach house!

Yes, that’s a Stuism too.

My brother and I have this thing where we come up with ridiculous band names and then say in this really pretentious, knowing tone, “Oh, well, you know, it’s just one guy.”

Oh boy. I am pleased to announce the return of Battle of the Fake Bands. Yes!

This week our final contestants are:

Our Baby Koala Overlords


Monster Sidecar

Oh yes. It’s weird though, because it’s just one guy.

Thanks @nathanbowers and @jzy for the first one and my goofball retreaters at the Destuckification Retreat for the second one. 🙂

And … STUISMS of the week.

Stu is my paranoid McCarthy-ist voice-to-text software who delights in torturing me misunderstanding me. I can’t stand him.

Stu is on vacation this week too because of the retreating. Alas.

It’s also kind of awesome though because I went an entire week without typing and ohmygod yay.

That’s it for me …

And yes yes yes, of course you can join in my Friday ritual right here in the comments bit if you feel like it.

Yeah? Anything hard and/or good happen in your week?

And, as always, have a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious weekend. And a happy week to come.

The Fluent Self