very personal adsPersonal ads! They’re … personal! Very.

So my itty bitty personal ads made me realize that it’s time to make a regular practice of trying to feel okay asking for stuff.

Even when the asking thing feels weird and conflicted.

Ever since I posted the first one asking my perfect house to find me, which united me with Hoppy House, I have been a fan of the madness that is personal ads.

And now it’s my Sunday ritual. Yay, ritual!

Let’s do it.

Thing 1: back-up!

Here’s what I want:

So my Biggification 2010 program filled up before I even got around to announcing it, officially or otherwise.

And my Destuckification Retreat has one spot left (?!), after it was briefly Item!ized the other day.*

Which is brilliant. Thank you, Very Personal Ads of Sundays past.

What I want now is a back-up list. Because some people may not make it past the final interview stage.

And you can pretty much count on someone having to cancel for whatever reason.

* Note to self: add “Item!ized” to the glossary of Fluent-Self-isms. Along with Havilanche.

Ways this could work:

I could ask my First Mate to set up a waiting list.

Maybe there is some elegant red velvet ropiness that could happen there too.

Some other, better idea could come to me.

My commitment.

I will be madly appreciative of all the amazing people who want to be a part of my stuff.

And I will try to set up my systems in such a way that it’s really clear what to do and how it works.

I will do a little jig.

Thing 2: Some time off. In a regular sort of way.

Here’s what I want:

I want to go back to taking the day off on Wednesday.

Admittedly, this was only ever a theoretical construct but what the hell. It was one I kind of liked. Even if never actually happened.

Here’s how I want this to work:

The power of logic.

Since I often teach classes on the weekend, I don’t really have a weekend. But I forget that, since I don’t do work-work (i.e. in front of the Infernal Machine) on weekends.

It is time for me to really, truly, not-just-theoretically start counting teaching as work-work, and to insist on a weekend in the middle of the week.

I’m ready to start assimilating this new definition of work-work, and to notice when I start to marginalize what I do just because I happen to enjoy it.

My commitment.

To make this a high-priority thing.

To ask for deguiltified reminders from my gentleman friend and the group leaders at the Kitchen Table.

To schedule a few non-work-ey things on Wednesdays that are purely enjoyable, so that I don’t accidentally slip while I’m getting acclimated to this new pattern.

To be patient with myself. It may be a long time coming, but it’s still a big, symbolic shift and I am allowed to take my time with it.

To not let people lecture me about how I should have done this earlier or how it’s so obvious that work-work is a broad thing. Or whatever. I don’t have to be lectured.

Thing 3: I have a thank you

Here’s what it is.

I don’t know if you guys remember this but a while back I had an ask for my Sacramento Biggification Day.

Specifically, I wanted Right People for it who were awesome. The program filled up within a day or two, and pretty soon we had a waiting list as well.

What I didn’t realize though was just how right those Right People were.

This is basically the best thing in the entire world.

So I teach about the Right People thing all the time, but the reality of it is still mind-boggling.

On Friday I had the pleasure of spending the day with some of the brightest, kind-hearted-est, silliest right people in the history of right people.

I genuinely adored every single person there, and they all got on fabulously with each other.

The amazing thing was that it was only one day — and still by the end of it there were all these beautiful friendships.

And everyone was completely committed to biggifying each other up in a sincere, loving, hey-we’re-in-this-together sort of way.

Thank you, right people. Thank you, concept of Right People.

To everyone who came (from London, Chicago, New Jersey, Tucson, Seattle, Portland and all over California) to spend one day with me:

I like you so much. And I believe in you so much.

To the idea that I am allowed (and maybe even required) to work with the kind of people that I like being around — people who get me and like me, wow.

You have changed my life, you crazy, sweet little conceptual thing.

Thank you!

Progress report on past Very Personal Ads.

The update on what’s happened since last time.

Really, really good news!

First off: I wanted help getting through the fog.

And I ended up getting in the zone (thanks to a combination of a brilliant session with Hiro and doing some Shiva Nata).

I got more done in two days than I’ve managed in months. Zoooooooooooooom. It was fantastic.

Thanks to those two days of mad accomplishings, I was able to brunch thricely, which was lovely.

I also wanted sovereignty help with my difficult situations. It feels better. Does that count?

Way less upset, at any rate. Getting the monies from one person and still waiting on the other. But am over being hurt. That’s the extra-important thing. I’m still committed to doing what it takes to get the monies.

The other thing I brought up was my holiday list of businesses I’d like to see biggify. And I can’t really report on that yet because who knows. But time will tell.

Comments. Since I’m already asking …

I am adding to my practice of asking for stuff by being more specific about what I would like to receive in the comments. And that way, if you feel like leaving one (you totally don’t have to), you get to be part of this experiment too. :)

Here’s what I want (just leave them in the comments):

  • Your own personal ads, small or large. Things you’ve asked for. Or are asking for. Or would like to ask for. Or updates on last time!

What I would rather not have:

  • Reality theories.
  • Shoulds. As in, “You should be doing it like this” or “That’s not the right way to ask for things — instead it should be like x, y and z”
  • To be judged or psychoanalyzed.

My commitment.

I am committing to getting better at asking for things even when asking feels weird.

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