My weekend got eaten by bears!
but it did get eaten
and I agreed to it
and now I am sick. Surprise!
But mainly I can’t decide if it’s worse that I didn’t get a weekend or a vacation
that I had been so dearly looking forward to…
or if it’s worse that I allow external circumstances to take over
because I don’t want people to think bad things about me. Familiar?
Wanting to please and fear of not pleasing
winning out over the hard-earned/hard-learned truths I’ve committed to.
I guess it’s all the worst part.
Because I am more depleted now than when I set out to vacation
and I want to be cared for
and that job is mine
and I am not good at it
- The above is what we call a woem. Woem!
- A woem is a poem of woe and grumbles.
- It’s something we invented at the Whine Bar in my Kitchen Table program. Full name: Crankypants McGrumbleBug’s Kvetchtastic Whine Bar!
- Its purpose is to make you feel better through writing it.
- Or at the very least to get some of the woe out of your head.
- Because when you acknowledge pain and grief, and give it room to exist and be legitimate, something moves.
- And usually you also notice something interesting too. Side effect!
- The thing I noticed was about how there aren’t any bears. Kind of like how on some level I know that there is no shoe.
- My pain and resentment was my stuff, as it pretty much always is.
- The other thing I noticed was about YET.
- I am a fan of yet.
- It takes the sting out of blame.
- It says, “Okay, so maybe I’m not there yet but I’m working on it and I’m in a process.”
- It says, “I’m here. Right now. And here is okay because there is a trajectory in play, and this is where I’m at with it.”
- Yet opens up possibility and spaciousness.
Play with me? And comment zen for the giant blanket fort.
- If you would like to write a woem (or musings about YET), go for it.
- You can share it if you like but you totally don’t have to.
- The brilliant thing about woems is that they don’t have to be written especially well, or at all. Because that’s not the point. The point is interacting with woe.
- The fountain doesn’t judge. Woes or grumbles can be tiny or large. They all count.
- A woem about toe-stubbing is just as valid as a woem about deep grief and loss.
- We all have our stuff. We’re all working on our stuff.
- We take responsibility for our stuff and we make room for other people to have their stuff.
- We make this a safe and welcoming space by not telling each other what to do, how to think or how to feel.