My weekend got eaten by bears!
Not really,
but it did get eaten
and I agreed to it
and now I am sick. Surprise!

But mainly I can’t decide if it’s worse that I didn’t get a weekend or a vacation
that I had been so dearly looking forward to…
or if it’s worse that I allow external circumstances to take over
because I don’t want people to think bad things about me. Familiar?

Wanting to please and fear of not pleasing
winning out over the hard-earned/hard-learned truths I’ve committed to.
I guess it’s all the worst part.

Because I am more depleted now than when I set out to vacation
and I want to be cared for
and that job is mine
and I am not good at it



  1. The above is what we call a woem. Woem!
  2. A woem is a poem of woe and grumbles.
  3. It’s something we invented at the Whine Bar in my Kitchen Table program. Full name: Crankypants McGrumbleBug’s Kvetchtastic Whine Bar!
  4. Its purpose is to make you feel better through writing it.
  5. Or at the very least to get some of the woe out of your head.
  6. Because when you acknowledge pain and grief, and give it room to exist and be legitimate, something moves.
  7. And usually you also notice something interesting too. Side effect!
  8. The thing I noticed was about how there aren’t any bears. Kind of like how on some level I know that there is no shoe.
  9. My pain and resentment was my stuff, as it pretty much always is.
  10. The other thing I noticed was about YET.
  11. I am a fan of yet.
  12. It takes the sting out of blame.
  13. It says, “Okay, so maybe I’m not there yet but I’m working on it and I’m in a process.”
  14. It says, “I’m here. Right now. And here is okay because there is a trajectory in play, and this is where I’m at with it.”
  15. Yet opens up possibility and spaciousness.

Play with me? And comment zen for the giant blanket fort.

  • If you would like to write a woem (or musings about YET), go for it.
  • You can share it if you like but you totally don’t have to.
  • The brilliant thing about woems is that they don’t have to be written especially well, or at all. Because that’s not the point. The point is interacting with woe.
  • The fountain doesn’t judge. Woes or grumbles can be tiny or large. They all count.
  • A woem about toe-stubbing is just as valid as a woem about deep grief and loss.
  • We all have our stuff. We’re all working on our stuff.
  • We take responsibility for our stuff and we make room for other people to have their stuff.
  • We make this a safe and welcoming space by not telling each other what to do, how to think or how to feel.


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