I’ve been projectizing like crazy at the Rally (Rally!) … and then I got myself into a plonter and had to untangle a bit.

(Also, really? The last time I said plonter here – August 2007? That can’t be right.)

Here’s what happened.

Asking the version of me who has finished this part:

Me: Okay. I have to say, this project-like-thing already feels like the biggest headache and I haven’t even started. Help?

Slightly Future Me: Aw, sweetie. Have some water. You’ll feel better.

Me: Right.

Slightly Future Me: Listen, it feels like a headache because your body is remembering last year’s headache. It’s like the bully thing. You’re seeing the shadow and not the thing itself.

Me: Oh, right. Now is not then.

Finding what is different.

Slightly Future Me: It won’t be a headache this time. Last year at this time you were reacting. You were in reactive mode and just responding to headaches. It was headaches generating headaches.

The time of putting out fires.

And that’s not where you are now. What you want, how you want it, the way you approach finding out what needs to happen. It’s all different.

Me: That feels better. Okay. Present time. Separating from then. Breathing. And then I’ll just VPA the hell out of things.

Finding out what you want.

Slightly Future Me: Yes. What do you wish for?

Me: Ease. Creativity. Spaciousness. Silliness. To have forms and structures that can hold themselves.

Slightly Future Me: Right on.

Me: So what do I do now?

Slightly Future Me: Oh come on. You know that.

Setting up Y to work on Z.

Me: Oh, right. Dominoes! I’m setting the following intentions:

  1. That everything I do to bring ease and creativity into my life will have a direct effect on Z.
  2. That everything (Y) I end up doing for Z will bring more ease and creativity into everything else we’re working on.
  3. That this new way will get easier and more comfortable until it is the only way to do things.
  4. That I will keep talking to these projects and finding out how we can be better friends.

Going to do that now.

Talking to what you want.

Me: Hey project of X! What do you wish I knew?


Me: yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawn. Hey.
P of X: yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawn.
Me: Wow. That felt really good.
P of X: I know! You’re all stressed out about this and then you’re trying to invoke ease while you’re stressed out. And it’s not working. Obviously.
Me: That makes sense.

More yawning.

P of X: You know what you need? You need the giant ALL ABOARD sign.
Me: Huh?
P of X: Here’s what you do with this. You set a date. You call all aboard. That’s it.
Me: Huh?
Me: Really? That simple?


P of X: Of course. All the right things are that simple.
Me: But I thought it would need twenty-seven steps and to lay them all out. That’s why I’m projectizing this nightmare of a thing. Because it’s so complex. I thought we needed a new and elaborate system.
P of X: *giggles* No, it needs a simple system. Here it is. ALL ABOARD. Tell them once. That’s it. You could do it like A or like B or like C. It doesn’t really matter. The point is, one option.
Me: That’s helpful.

And the third thing.

Slightly Future Me: That was great.

Me: Okay, so I feel better. But it’s still a lot to handle.

Slightly Future Me: Well, you’re doing great. Can I tell you the third thing?

Me: There’s a third thing? I don’t even know what the first two were.

Slightly Future Me: We established that 1) things are different and it’s important to separate from what was, and 2) this can happen with EASE.

Here’s the third thing. It can be playful. You can have play.

Purple wigs.

Me: I can?

Slightly Future Me: Yes.

Me: How?

Slightly Future Me: However you want. With contests. With crayons and colored markers. With whatever kooky innovative ideas that you get from Shiva Nata.

Me: I have no idea what you’re talking about.

Slightly Future Me: It doesn’t matter. The point is that what you want can happen with in a playful, beautiful way. I promise. And the new version of this thing you’re creating through playing will be light and solid at the same time. And people will play there and wear purple wigs. On occasion.

Say the word.

Me: That was pretty specific. Are you wearing a purple wig right now?

Slightly Future Me: It is quite possible, yes. But whatever you’re imagining, it does not live up to how completely ridiculous I look. You kind of interrupted me in the middle of some pretty intense hilarity.

Me: Oh. Sorry about that.

Slightly Future Me: Not at all. I’m always here for you when you need stuff. Just say the word.

Me: Wait, there’s a word?

Slightly Future Me: No. Do you want a word?

Me: Yes.

Slightly Future Me: Catnap! Catnip! Catnoooooooooooop.

Me: Okay. Fine. Never mind. I’ll just call or whatever.

And comment zen in the comment blanket fort today.

The usual. We all have our stuff. We’re all working on our stuff. It’s a process.

The way we respectfully let people here have their own experience is this: we are curious and patient, we try to not jump to conclusions, and we don’t give each other unsolicited advice.

Playing is welcome. If you want to talk to a slightly future you or to your project or to have a yawn-fest with me, go for it.

And if you have ideas for things to do with purple wigs, I’ll take them.

The Fluent Self