Questions. You might have some.

So what’s this site about?

There are two main things we tend to talk about around here:

1. Destuckification: working through the stucknesses that keep you from doing things that you care about. Figuring out what your stuff is and how it works, so you can take care of yourself in really important ways.

2. Mindful biggification: the art and science of getting your thing into the hands of your people without feeling icky or weird. And without having to use the m-word if you don’t feel like it.

And often I write about my own process: my conversations with walls and monsters, or what it’s like to work on a pirate ship.

Really? You don’t do email? Ever?

I’ve been on email sabbatical since January, 2009.

What’s with the duck?

She’s my business partner. See also: the story of Selma.

How long have you been doing this?

Facilitating a process of people working on their stuff has been a thing for a long time. I’ve been teaching in some form or another since 1993.

The vision for this emerged in March, 2005 in Berlin. This website went live that August. March 7, 2006 is the day I walked into City Hall in San Francisco and announced that I was starting a business.

I started blogging regularly in June 2008 — you can peek at the archives for a sense of just how much things have changed since then).

In 2010, we opened the Destuckification Playground, a studio for creative self-work, in Portland Oregon.

As of April 2012, we’re opening a much larger space where anyone can come and play whenever they like.

I heard you’re the one who invented the word biggification?

Also “stucknesses” and “right people”. See the glossary (it makes your hair all shiny!) for other Havi-isms you might run into around here.

I left a comment on the blog and it’s not showing up. Do you hate me?

Oh, sweetie. Of course I don’t hate you. That’s your stuff talking.

I would assume misunderstanding! It’s pretty much always what’s going on.

My pirate crew moderates comments for me and they’re not online all the time. Chances are that your comment just hasn’t been processed yet.

Also, occasionally a comment trips our spam filter for no reason. It could take a day or two to be found.

The only comments that ever get deleted are mean-spirited shoes or unsolicited advice, whether aimed in my direction or towards anyone else. This really hardly ever happens.

Do you accept guest posts?

Sorry, no. I write everything here.

But if you’re a Shivanaut (someone who does Shiva Nata, even very occasionally!), and you want to write a guest post for the Shiva Nata site, you can send a submission.

Can I buy advertising on your site?

We don’t do advertising.

Will you review my ____________?

Probably not. Not because your stuff isn’t great, but because I don’t have the capacity.

Thousands and thousands of people read this site, and you would not believe the number of asks I get. Learning to respect my capacity has been one of the big crazy lessons of running a business.

I have questions about how to subscribe to a blog.

Right here is where you can subscribe — either by email or by rss. And if that made no sense, see: this explanation for more help.

I really want your stuff but I can’t afford it right now.

Oh, honey. I can imagine that you feel frustrated when you want something and can’t afford it, because you need to know that you’re going to be taken care of. That makes complete sense.

I want to acknowledge that frustration because it sucks when you’re in it. I know.

And I also want to say that there’s all kinds of free and useful stuff here on the blog. There are tools! Use the tools. And give them time.

In fact, you can use the tools to investigate and play with this very situation of money-stuck. They can help.

You can metaphor and proxy. You can negotiate and fractal flower. You can create safe rooms. You can name and notice. You can skip stones and invoke superpowers and find clews and ask why. You can try things.

Last time I looked there were over a thousand posts here.

Every single one written by me. Most of which are about useful tools and concepts for destuckifying. So please know that it’s here for you to use and practice, and that I truly hope you find something that is helpful for you.

Should I buy your stuff?

If you need to ask, now is probably not the time.

I’d honestly be much happier if you just hung out on the blog and soaked up the goodness. I don’t want you to pressure yourself into a hasty decision because that’s not good for anyone. When you feel ready to trust that your desire is telling you something important, that’s a good time.

Can I barter for stuff?

That’s not something we’re offering right now.

Where are you located?

Portland, Oregon. We have a center called (The Playground!). You should come.

Occasionally you’ll find me teaching in places like San Francisco or Taos or Asheville or Berlin. This used to happen way more, but now that we have a giant space to run, I don’t travel as much.

You can take a look at the events page for more about what’s going on.

I’m coming to Portland! Can we hang out?

You will love Portland.

I’m generally not available for hanging out. Between being insanely busy, highly introverted and highly sensitive, I’m trying to work on respecting my capacity.

And I just don’t have the capacity to meet with all the many amazing people who come through. I’m so sorry.

But maybe you’ll be able to come play at the Playground while you’re in town. That would be awesome.

Can I ask you questions?

The best way to get a question answered is sign up for one of my very occasional teleclasses. It’s free. And you could ask me stuff there.

Also: you might want to take a look at previous Ask Havi posts in case maybe one of those is relevant to your situation. Ooh, or the Blogging Therapy ones. Those are kind of helpful too.

Do you have a disclaimer?

I do! It’s several years old, but I can disclaim with the best of them. Here are our Ridiculously Boring Policies, too.

I want to send you fan-socks! Or other lovely things.

Ohmygod. I love fan-socks. My mailing address is on the contact page. Or, really, at the very bottom of every page on the site. That’s where I go to look it up too.

Yay. Hope that helps.
Big love,
Havi (and Selma the duck)