Fluent Self Item!A somewhat goofy mini-collection of stuff I’ve been reading, stuff I’ve been thinking about and oh, some completely random crap.

Basically the stuff that never gets mentioned here because I’m not the kind of person who can just make some teeny little point. Not into the whole brevity thing, as the Dude would say.

Actually, I’m under the strict compulsion to write ten pages about anything on my mind. So this is me. Practicing brevity.

I have a cold. It is impeding my ability to be even slightly interesting or entertaining.

Luckily it’s Wednesday. Which means, for some reason, that I get to let other people be interesting or entertaining. Or try to.

Here’s what I’ve got.

Item! My duck has got a brand new acronym!

(To be sung to the tune of Papa’s got a brand new bag)

Last week we learned that certain people who are not me think that Selma is not so much a duck as my Social Enabling Little Market-based Attractor (SELMA).

But this week I found out that the delightful Douglas Buchanan (who signed his latest missive Blessings and Quackeroos) has been secretly calling her my Socially Eccentric Lovable Marketing Assistant.

We are most amused. Well, Selma isn’t. But I am.

Item! I’m making you read this post!

So the lovely Amy Derby and I were twittering it up (why are you not on Twitter?!) about shoulds and why they suck. And about things that get on our nerves.

Go read her wonderful post. But first just admire the title: Let’s talk about cloning. Or how to lose weight while flipping real estate.

It’s hilarious. And full of great advice. Required reading for this week!

Item! You are about to yawn!

I did a Procrastination Dissolve-o-Matic VIP session the other week for the sweetest guy in the entire world. And at the end he confessed that he’d been terrified that I was going to make him yawn.

I rather like yawning. Anyway, that cracked me up.

And then Marissa sent me this note:

Saw this and thought of you since yawning now always makes me think of you.

Thought this was interesting because, in a way, yawning may literally help us keep a cool head.

And since “keeping a cool head” is used figuratively to describe calming down, getting refocused and recentered, and your UberYawns seem to kind of help do the same thing, I thought, well, how awesome that you were there before the scientists were. (It’s a pretty brief article.)



Item! I am obsessed with awkward communication!

Also with the Basic Instructions comic.

His How To Have a Horrifying Conversation piece works well with my own post on the topic from last week. Well, it doesn’t. But it kind of does.

Item! This is a GREAT About page!

Sit up and take notice.

Next time you write an About page, scrap it and reread this one.

I love it. Especially the “10 Reasons Not To Read This Blog”. Especially that there are only five of them.

Though Johnny Truant’s FAQ page is also pretty entertaining. It almost makes me want to dig up one of my old FAQs and totally rewrite it.

Item! The Periodic Table of Awesoments!

It’s kind of what it sounds like. Only what does it sound like? And it’s awesome. It says so right in the name.

Including such important things as: Dwarves, Lasers, Holograms, Cheese and Zombies, this is clearly an important scientific breakthrough.

Item! I am appreciated! Also, I get to say “midwifery”!

These lovely words come straight from the beautiful and smiley Grace Judson:

I want to say that I’ve always (from an absurdly early age) considered myself a writer. And your twittering and blogging have taught me a TON about not just marketing (you’re brilliant), but also about owning an authentic, real, honest voice. Thank you for that.

And just for the record, you’re a blogging midwife, not a blogging mommy. I speak as someone for whom you seem to be midwifing a blog.

See? I am all about the blogging (wait for it) midwifery. How cool is that?


That’s the end our our exclamation-point-centric Items! for the day.

For the week, actually.

Tomorrow there should be some insights again. I certainly hope so.

Especially once I can return to breathing through my nose, which seems to be the only way I can think properly. *smiles weakly and goes to make a cup of tea*