What's in the gallery?

We dissolve stuck and rewrite patterns. We apply radical playfulness to life (when we feel like it!), embarking on internal adventures (credo of Safety First). We have a fake band called Solved By Cake. We build invisible sanctuaries, invent words and worlds, breathe awe and wonder.

We are not impressed by monsters. Except when we are. We explore the connections between internal territories and surrounding environment to learn what marvelously supportive delicious space feels like, and how to take exquisite care of ourselves. We transform things.* We glow wild.**

* For example: Desire, fear, worry, pain-and-trauma, boundaries, that problematic word which rhymes with flaweductivity.

** Fair warning: Self-fluency has been known to lead to extremely subversive behavior, including treasuring yourself unconditionally, unapologetically taking up space, experiencing outrageously improbable levels of self-acceptance, and general rejoicing in aliveness.


Friday Chicken #143: the chicken never lies

Friday chickenIn which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of ritual and self-reflection.

And you get to join in if you feel like it.

Apparently it’s Friday.

That feels wrong, but the chicken never lies. So here we are. Friday!

The hard stuff

Tired and then napping and then missing half the day.

I don’t know what was going on, but man it must have been intense because I wanted to do nothing but sleep.

And half hour pick-me-up naps kept turning into four hour nap marathons.

That part was kind of nice while it was happening, but then you realize that the day is over and nothing is done, and you have to make peace with that and it turns out that I am not good at that.

Just fixed an entertaining typo — “marathorns” instead of marathons. Which tells you how I feel about marathons.

Monsters and walls and stucknesses. Lions and tigers and bears!.

Actually I lied, and I do know why I’ve been wanting to do nothing but sleep.

This week was all about the hard. I am in a serious growth period right now, and my monsters and I were in full-on negotiations, Camp David style.

Time-consuming, exhausting and painful.

Alas, no follow-through.

Last week’s amazing in-the-zone whoosh of getting things done left a bunch of loose ends that were going to all be neatly tied up this week.

But that didn’t happen.

And it took me a while to realize it wasn’t going to happen, and so I kept fighting and trying to nudge it into happening, when that’s not the way it works.

Insert ore monster-ey stuff there about how this is why projects are useless since you leave them half-finished, grumble grumble. And back to processing!

The never-ending phone calls of doom.

So I have gotten considerably better at working creatively with my intermittent phone phobia.

And instead of calls, I have secret spy missions to set up the next rendezvous and collect clues.

But this week there were about sixteen thousand of these. Sigh.

And it’s not like you feel better about anything when you’re done. Just momentary relief, followed by the realization that now you have to go to the dentist, and meet people and be nice.

Still disoriented. Calendar not helping.

Is it really truly almost May?!

How did that even happen? Oh, right. My ridiculously long Slump of Burnout. Got it.

The good stuff

Roller Derby + Shiva Nata = best thing in the entire world.

I taught a Shiva Nata class to fifteen of the Guns N Rollers (the team that Selma and I sponsor) and it was so much fun that I am still kind of in awe.

We did hard core body-brain coordination madness. There was much flailing, giggling and yelling.

We worked on blocking, hitting and sprinting, all without being on skates.

It was crazy and wonderful and I can’t wait to do it again.


I always make a ton of changes at the Playground between events, but this month has been the most fun.

We have been completely redoing the Toy Shop, and it is absolutely transformed.

A ton of work this week, but so worth it. I’m feeling really good about how this neglected space is becoming so magical and sparkly!

Butt monsters! We have butt monsters, people!

The butt monsters are the most-adored things at the Playground. Everyone wants one, and I am constantly being asked if I will sell them.

Except that I love the butt-monsters too much to part with them, and the woman who makes them had disappeared.

She came back! And now we have twenty squeezy and charming butt-monsters for sale in the shop. Get them fast because they are going to disappear.

Also, I am kind of half in love with all of them, and sitting on my hands not to buy them myself.

The Shiva Nata teacher training!

It’s not until September, but just looking at the people who have already signed up, it’s going to be a seriously fantastic mix of people.

Like at the last training, there are some people who have been shiva-ing it up for a while and some people who have no idea what it is and have never tried it, but know that this will be a crazy, wonderful thing so they’re coming. I love it.

Making lots of plans and generally having fun.

Speaking of, progress!

The re-re-recording of the audio for the Shiva Nata iPhone app went really well. Better than expected.

And I learned a secret which is that wearing a pink wig makes everything easier, and so from now on I’m just going to do that for everything.

Speaking of, epiphanies!

All the Shiva Nata baking my brain has resulted in some VERY big understandings, that are doing good things in my business.

There’s no way I would have been able to handle all the monster negotiations this week without the shivanautical insights, so that was really fortunate.

Tradition. I like it.

My friend Dana found me this week having dinner.

That’s because I was at my regular place on my regular day at the regular time in my regular seat drinking my regular drink and having my regular food.

And it just made me so happy that a) I have these lovely containers for my life, and b) that my friends come and find me in them.

And … playing live at the meme beach house it’s the Fake Band of the Week!

My brother and I have this thing where we come up with ridiculous band names and then say in this really pretentious, knowing tone, “Oh, well, you know, it’s just one guy.”

This week’s band makes me giggle.

The Florida Quease

Yes, well. I imagine it’s kind of a swingy country sound. And yes, it’s really just one guy.

That’s it for me …

And of course you can join in my Friday ritual right here in the comments if you feel like it.

Yes? Anything hard and/or good happen in your week?

And, as always, have a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious day, a restful weekend and a happy week to come. Shabbat shalom.

p.s. It’s okay if it’s not Friday anymore. There’s complete chicken amnesty — you can join in whenever (or not) and it’s no big deal.

25 Responses to Friday Chicken #143: the chicken never lies

  1. Rose
    Twitter: celestialrose

    I am SOO glad it’s Friday Chicken.. I was afraid it wouldn’t happen today. So glad I get some of my normal amidst the weird things going on here in England.

    The hard stuff
    Royal stuff. Means all my normal stuff is ignored/not on/missed out/can’t reach it. I can’t watch TV, use the internet or go outside because I want to avoid it. Which means I am a prisoner. Grr. feeling very low about it. So I may go out anyway, but i’m going to get annoyed with people :( and I don’t want to be annoyed with people. -stops ranting-

    My dissertation.
    Oh yeah. i found serious issues. For those of a stats mindset, my data was skewed, abnormally distributed and if i removed outliers, i end up with no data and no results. its due on tuesday. -sob sob-

    So i asked for help, which was hard. Set up a meeting 9scary) with a tutor.. and then she cancelled. Panic panic panic.

    i keep forgetting to buy potatoes.
    I’;ve been shopping three times this week (i hate shopping) and i forgot potatoes all three times; so i can’t make cottage pie or potato bake. Sad sad times.

    The plans for a funeral were made and I had to try and do all the supportive family stuff via skype. on a bad connection.

    Not sleeping. See last 15 weeks worth of chickens.

    I can feel my body reaching burnout.. i can feel it and yet.. i cant do much about it. i’m taking breaks, ive been going to be dearly, ive got lavender oil and piano music to play before bed… and it’s just internal conflict that wont shift until next week. i better invite it to take a seat and offer it tea cos its not going anywhere.

    Right. Sod the bad stuff. :)

    The good stuff

    Found a maybe-solution for the dissertation issue. Log transformation as the square root transformation didn’t help. then aggregate and restructure. then it works. now to write it up, explain why its done what its done and then write a discussion with previous research. Mneh. good to have a plan.

    I am meeting another shivanaut today!!!! My first in-person meet with someone else who practises. Hoorah!

    I’ve rediscovered a band I listened to as a teen – i liked them because of the RAWR lyrics but i’m now loving the guitar solos and general musical tempo of it :)

    Freedom.. As of 4th may, I am FREE. I have 2 weeks to chill, do shivanata, write my novel [and revise for exams] – but the thesis will be done and in and huzzzzah!

    By next chicken, i’ll have given in my dissertation. Damn that feels awesome to know!

    I’ve been making time for friends this week, as my book of me says to do. When i got to an issue, i texted my friend who made me a mug of mint tea and BROUGHT IT TO ME in the PC rooms on campus. <3<3<3

    Have a fabulous weekend/beltain/week to everyone!! And if you need a hug, there's one on offer
    Rose recently posted… Shiva- destruction of patterns

  2. Bethany's Joy
    Twitter: carolynjfrancisgmail.com

    Yay. Something to do that isn’t royal wedding-ish (yawn)

    This week – the hard stuff
    – “short” week post Easter, but no less work to do. Therefore much feeling of “I have done nothing”
    – realising the stuff I said I’ll do after Easter, might need to be dealt with (stucknesses galore)
    – feeling much Incongruence between my “role” and the “self” that is emerging. What to do? Can I put up with that because of the bits of it I love, or is it doomed?

    The good stuff
    – I love my colleagues. Really. The best people.
    – I got some big doses of affirmation. Gold stars for me.
    – I went lots of days without missing HIM too much. Or if I did I just noticed it and then got on with LIFE. Maybe it actually is getting easier (shock horror)
    – I had one moment when I was actually glad HE wasn’t around and that it was OVER. Because I realised that no-one else was affecting whether today was good, bad or whatever. It was all up to me and I was choosing MAGNIFICENT instead. And that was the first time. And it was a very specific answer to a very specific VPA. So yay.

  3. Jane
    Twitter: JaneOfArdis

    Ooo…another Bank Holiday chicken. Yay!

    The hard:

    – train journey from hell on Tuesday – delayed, weirdo who decided the best way to attract my attention was poking/grabbing my knee, having shouting match with him, obnoxious chav family shrieking at each other, the most obnxious and inconsiderate behaviour I’ve ever seen on a train – including getting smacked repeatedly by a woman’s bag. Woe, woe and thrice woe.

    – goodbyes and suddenly realising how much someone means to me and how much I’ll miss them…ouch. Super sad face.

    The good:

    – everyone being in a consistently good mood again this week
    – not letting people push me around at work
    – work place hilarity with Will and Kate masks
    – shooting with Russ went better than I could’ve imagined, got a variety of fabulous images, lots of variety. Feeling that this is something I can really do.
    – taking action steps!
    – my cousin came to visit and it was awesome
    – got some great photos
    – feeling like I’m integrating stuff all of a sudden
    – looking forward to the future
    – feeling like good things are possible
    – I drew a treasure map…and then I used it today and it was super useful.
    – getting clearer on project work I need to do for uni
    – did I mention a two day working week? Fab.

    All in all, a good week despite the ouchey.

  4. Kylie
    Twitter: kyliewriteshere

    Florida Queaze. Listening to them must make you feel like you’re on a cruise ship, or something.

    The hard:

    – I, too, am in a state of growth, business-wise. Right now there are lots of monsters hanging around, though I know they’re just passing through.

    – Moodiness. Mine and that of others. A wee bit of a roller coaster of emotions.

    – Sometimes I’m quite the sensitive mouse, and feel like I’ve had shoes thrown at me even when I haven’t at all.

    – Spring in NY is hard for me. Ouch.

    The good:

    – Excitement about the business growth spurt, despite the monsters.

    – A roller coaster of emotions also means positive ones!

    – Still lots of writing happening. Yay!

    – I definitely made progress on my VPAs, surprisingly. Very excited about that.

    Happy weekend, everyone!

  5. Beth says:

    Friday! Funny how reliable it tends to be.

    This week’s hard:
    -Yesterday did not go well. Sort of like having an audition and walking in feeling prepared, and walking out knowing you didn’t get the spot. Bugger.
    -Reality of job loss settling in after the initial shock. Weird and uncomfortable. But I think that’s done now.
    -Tired, and yet I can’t sleep. I think more moving about time is needed.

    This week’s good:
    -The wedding. Please don’t shoot me. I’m not obsessed by any means, but I was so relieved at how well it went, it was gorgeous to watch, and I’m delighted for them. Also it’s an excuse to make scones.
    -End-of-spring season is now half over. Two down, two to go.
    -It rained. Finally. Hallelujah. (see also: Florida Quease. I’ve been listening to that all week! It’s definitely on the twangy side.)
    -Progress on resume, cover letter, etc. I hate writing them, but it’s getting there and I am less panicked.
    -Working on little projects. Always brightens my day to make things.

    Happy Friday everyone and hope it’s a delightful weekend!

  6. Melissa says:

    Friday – wow, already… this is good, i think

    The Hard:

    -This morning I did not hear my alarm. Now I’m all tired and wonky for the rest of the day.

    – Run yesterday was super slow and now my body is achy and tired. I’m kind of concerned because we’re supposed to start official ironman training in ten days. i’m gonna need lots of rest this weekend and this coming week.

    – Allergies

    – Easter, my grandma decided to cancel easter and blame it on me. i called friday afternoon to ask what i should bring and oh, i’m not having it b/c ur going to steven’s family. well, we talked about it with her and planned to go to her house at a bbq the weekend before easter. that hurt a lot. first easter i haven’t had with my family. and my grandma cancelled with my mom first and told her i was going out of town (husbands family is 3 miles from my house) so she made plans already too by the time i found out. stirred up all kinds of emotional stuff for me. but i did remember that if my grandma cancels things and blames them on anyone else including me, that it’s her stuff, not mine.

    The good –
    – mailed out a job app monday for a librarian job, much more up my alley
    – wrote hello day letters and omg they totally work for giving me clarity/better day- thank you havi
    – micromovements – writing down (in the hello day letter)a babystep towards a goal to try every day just one or two that takes 5 minutes or less totally works
    Melissa recently posted… Cleaning House Picture Table Top Fairy

  7. Rhiannon
    Twitter: rhiannonlaurie

    Friday. Wow. Friday. Friday was the day I had to be packed by.

    The Hard.
    – Last night one of my housemates’ boyfriends’ dogs chased my cat away I spent most of the night listening to cat fights and trying to find him and crying and being wrathful. Not fun. But at least he’s back now.
    – Choir is all kinds of unfair recently. But at least it’ll be done after tomorrow’s concert.
    – I also fainted in choir. Which wasn’t so bad in real life (only two people noticed) but in my head it has turned into a big. hairy. incident.
    – Monsters in general. Which makes sense, because everything is all astir. But they don’t express themselves very kindly.
    – I am very bad at endings and goodbyes. I would rather slip away unnoticed but I also do care about people’s feelings and how I leave them…

    The Good.
    – I am moving on Sunday! To Portland! I am even kind of mostly sort of packed (Or could be, anyway. Yay for owning almost nothing).
    – Working with fabulous web designers and branding helpers to make a whole new website. Which will be launched in only a few weeks. Awesome weeks.
    – Lots of help from my inner council this week – the five people I e-mail or call when anything momentous happens. Which kind of collapses my narrative of having no real people to turn to when the going gets rough. I have five such people.
    – I made a Performance Revue! Binder and it is the most beautiful silly magical thing ever. LOVE.
    Rhiannon recently posted… What Your Inner Creative Diva Deserves

  8. Kathleen Avins
    Twitter: spiralsongkat

    Ah, yes, Florida Quease! I remember I used to get them mixed up with Florida Queues. They were huge in Orlando.

    –Trying to shift some stubborn patterns, and meeting with a lot of inner resistance.
    –Procrastinating on some fairly important stuff.
    –Perhaps because of the first two items, I have been finding myself verrrry foggy this week.

    –The dissertation proposal has been submitted to my committee, well in advance of the deadline!
    –Orchestra and dress rehearsals this week; concerts this weekend. We’re singing Haydn’s Creation and also Triptych by Tarik O’Regan. Glorious music.
    –I get to spend some time with one of my sisters tonight!

    All in all, this week has been a bit of a blur. I’m hoping for some clarity (hot and buttered, perhaps?) this coming Beltane weekend. Love to you all!
    Kathleen Avins recently posted… Minimum daily requirements

  9. seagirl says:

    The Hard:
    Shooting pain down my arm and into my finger. Acupucture didn’t really help.

    The house isn’t going to clean itself.

    The Good:
    Wedding. Squee!

    Much progress on the Bikini Roto, moving towards the discomfort and finding it less uncomfortable that way.

    New spring clothes.

    More clients and work.

    Progress made in the Friday House Cleaning.

    New books about all kinds of good stuff.

    Sunny days and sleeping with windows open.

    Discovering that if I sleep with an eye mask on I don’t wake up in the middle of the night.

  10. Andi
    Twitter: annaline_39

    I really identify with the avoidance sleep.

    Car died *again*. At the end of the street this time. When I needed to take Izzy for his annual assessment test.

    Buttons being pushed. I don’t do hospitals well. Finding out that something I did five years ago while he was in surgery was still making DH mad. Having to explain exactly why hospitals push my buttons so hard. Again. (maybe this time he got it)

    End of the month food budget.

    Watching the horrific radar on Wednesday night and seeing the storms pass over my family’s homes in Tennessee.

    The car dying was not related to the strange noise. The strange noise had, in fact, been taken care of on Monday with the application of a muffler strap. Proving that I have not lost my “grown up in Detroit of course I know car stuff” cred (I had been insisting for the past two months of strange noise that it was muffler related).

    The rain finally stopped.

    Thanks to Facebook, I knew within an hour that my family was ok.

    I got my amazing thread that I won from Aurifil. My name “Silver Fox” was the winner for a gray variegated thread and the prize was a whole set of 36 colors. :D

    My business was featured at the Right Brain Business Plan blog on Monday http://www.rightbrainbusinessplan.com/2011/04/25/spotlight-on-andrea-stern-of-andrea-stern-designs/

    I won the Life Is Messy planner from Vianza.com

    My friend the minister was able to take me and Izzy to his test on Wednesday.

    Sun! Yesterday!

    Oh, and lilacs and wisteria and this weird bush that looks like it is orchids or lilies but it is a bush.

    Happy weekend, y’all!
    Andi recently posted… One Part Inspiration

  11. Sue T says:

    This week’s hard:
    – Horrible tornado week in the South, many lives lost, many injuries, huge destruction.
    – Cousin in New Mexico lost her house and several pets to a fire. Can’t reach her yet to find out how to help.
    – Yard work delay due to storms. Huge weeding backlog. Plus need to get a tree trimmed but it’s blooming and I can’t get to it due to the bees.
    – Declutter work stalled after big progress last week.

    The good:
    + Cousin’s husband had only minor burns from when he unsuccessfully tried to put the fire out, cousin is OK. Barn, horses and three dogs not affected. So grateful.
    + Finally got started on yard work after storms were over. Decided it’s OK to do only a couple of hours a day so my back doesn’t rebel.
    + I am able to send some help to my cousin once I talk to her.
    + Bees must be drunk on holly pollen! They bump into me and fly back to the next flower.
    + Visited some plant nurseries. Decided to tear out and replace the foundation shrubs in front of my townhouse this summer. So, I don’t have to do much pruning on the ones that are there now!
    + Discovery! Apparently bright colors are essential to restarting declutter work. They don’t just work for organizing bins, but they work on my brain, too! Yay!

    Happy weekend, chickeneers!

  12. the fat nutritionist
    Twitter: fatnutritionist

    I need a butt-monster IMMEDIATELY. Are they available online somewhere?!

  13. Leni says:

    I’m lucky, very little hard this week, altho it was long.

    The Hard:
    -hip pain reall bad, plus new weird elbow ailment (massive bursitis, huge, hot and weird)
    -full time week is loooong
    -husband really not happy at work
    -too many balls in air
    -staying sober (not so much)

    The Good:
    -full tiome employment! paychecks that are worth actually cashing! savings going up! landscaping paid off! sushi!!!!!
    -finally ordering my Starter Kit! yea!
    -getting started learning the 8 basic posiions in Level 1 and feeling an immediate neuro-transmitter rush. so sweet! Fetch/YoungSelf got all wiggly over it!
    -no big epiphanies yet, but mornings are soooo much easier.
    -spring! perfumed aitr and bunnies!
    -that silly Wedding. I gto teary when i saw her dress.

  14. kim
    Twitter: avoidingkim

    it’s friday again? and almost MAY? WTF.

    The HARD:

    – resistance, resistance, stuckness and resistance. feels huge. feels unmovable and unknowable.
    – momentum gone. my thing is just sitting here in my brain losing it’s vibrancy.
    – an issue that has been lurking around for about a year (due to other people’s lack of interest in pursuing it) is now suddenly urgent and they want me to address it. i was ready to deal with it a year ago. and ready six months ago when i had to hire an attorney (and yes, i’m an attorney) and spend a fortune to respond in writing to them. no response until yesterday and they want me to drop everything and rush in to deal with it. i don’t want to. i resent it. i want to tell them to kiss off but that would probably be a super bad idea, but i may do it anyway. worst of all is that i feel regret for having spent most of my career doing child welfare work. i don’t want to feel that way.
    – still not finding help re: mom. i had last weekend “off” then everyone disappeared again all week. now people want to help on the weekend, which is great, but they don’t seem to understand that mom can’t handle a lot of activity, so when they all show up at once, it is a party for them and stressful/exhausting for mom. then monday, tues, wed she’s completely wiped.
    – feeling confronted re: son’s graduation festivities. his dad and stepmom have taken it upon themselves to do some unilateral planning and i feel like posting a billboard “BUT I’M HIS MOMMY!” and i know it’s better just to go with the flow. but, dammit.


    – i had a retreat last weekend! mountains! a river! snow! a fireplace! peace. quiet. alone alone alone.
    – i had a massage/facial – yesssssss!
    – royal wedding! yes, i’m one of those people. i can’t help it, i love weddings. not a fan of monarchy, but have a soft spot for Diana’s baby boy :)
    – had dinner with an old friend — so relaxing/comforting to be with someone who has known you through ugly times and still thinks you’re great. (and wouldn’t mind sleeping with you again….)(but that is another story..)
    – office/art supplies! !!!!
    – dumped the official/stuffy “graduation announcements” from the school and designed my own. they are AWESOME! can’t wait to send them out.
    – lilacs are blooming :)

    hugs to all who need them and love to those suffering through horrible storms/destruction.

  15. Pompette
    Twitter: pascalerecher

    The Hard

    – I was supposed to go back to France to see my mum and work a couple of days, then car broke down, withotut the money to get it fixed in time to travel. so bye time with Mum, and bye days of work.
    – Finally getting the courage to break up with partner. lots of difficult talks, crying, and having to move out without having money in the bank (thanks you bank holidays for my cheque needing 15days to clear, thanks Easter and Royal wedding ! )
    – the guilt of being the one who breaks up and bring the Sad.
    – Discovering how little friends I have in England, like real friends, the one who are there when things get bad

    The Good
    – making a friend happy when the days of work you get her.
    – discovering people who are truly there when you need them, even some you didn’t expect.
    – discovering a good friend is going to be a father (well of twins, hard work ahead, but still happy times ! )
    – having the internet where I am and being able to chat online with my best friend.
    – getting some quick support from friends that give you hope
    – thinking that there’s going to be so much good out of this mess
    – watching bits of the royal wedding and seeing so many people happy for the vent. a bit of fairy tale is nice.

    Lots of hugs all round !

  16. Eve
    Twitter: evejacques

    Hugs all round from me too!

    The Hard:

    Procrastination, procrastination, procrastination.

    Many incidents of waking up late and having to get taxis to work.

    Realising amusing new flying alarm clock will not fix this.

    Nearly getting fired, and being given one week to improve my performance or I will be fired. Aaaaaaargh! There’s some deeply ingrained, chronic fear and anger that needs to shift *fast* if I’m going to do this. I’ve been sabotaging myself for almost my entire life and I need a transformation. I’m going to need insight, self-compassion and the courage to let things go.

    Realising I have a huge ugly abusive power struggle going on inside me.

    The Good:

    Realising I have a huge ugly abusive power struggle going on inside me.

    Doing more Shiva Nata than I have EVER done in an attempt to deal with my job issues.

    Talking myself out of getting fired on the spot!

    New flying alarm clock means the first waking moment of every day is a moment of play.

    Diet going really well in spite of all the upheavals.

    Lovely time away with friends last weekend. 2 people said they could practically see my aura/personal space/spiritual body expanding over the weekend, and then shrinking as I got close to home. I’ve since been trying to practise making my aura bigger (I know, woo woo, but it does make crazy intuitive sense to me.)
    Eve recently posted… Job crisis-inspired blither from my private journal

  17. Eve
    Twitter: evejacques

    Wait, and I forgot: Awesome first session with lovely counsellor!
    Eve recently posted… Job crisis-inspired blither from my private journal

  18. Whitney
    Twitter: whitneygrayrose

    I’m stuck right now. Did some emergency destuckifying and thought that I should do some chickening. So here I am.

    The Hard:
    -Being stuck. Feeling super behind on everything. Judgment, failure, doom, doom!

    -Not wanting to do anything but watch too much TV. All. Day. Long.

    -Becoming more aware of just how harshly I judge myself. I mean, the aware is good, but the judging isn’t fun or helpful.

    -Being asked to define my value system by Monday afternoon, to present it to interested parties. Yeeesh!

    -Relationship stuff is still hard and in transition.

    -Sleep schedule still being wacky, and not in a fun way. Sleep quality still being low. The irony of the fact that I missed my doctor’s appt about this problem because I couldn’t wake up.

    -Being alone this weekend. Dealing with loneliness, stuckness, ect. Tonight will be the worst, and the friend I usually call on isn’t available. Not sure what I’m going to do about that yet.

    -Super loud music played by neighbors. Yes, I get it, it’s your birthday, it’s Chico, the sun is out, it’s a day that ends in y. But can we please get a break? Srsly?

    The Good:
    +Sitting in the sun right now. It’s pretty awesome.

    +I’m going to Spain in July! I’m going I’m going! The money is here, the plane tickets are bought, and the classes are scheduled! There is some Conflicted Wanting in this, of course, but right now I’m focusing on the good: sipping cafe con leche in the Plaza Mayor every day, dancing my ass off at night, making a friendship pilgrimage to Barcelona, and bonus days in New York City and Paris, neither of which I’ve ever visited.

    +A discussion with the Never Monster last night. My first attempt. I didn’t get to the bottom of what this monster’s mission is, but at least I recognized that it was the monster, not me, who kept saying “You’ll never fall asleep! NEVER!”.

    +A new planning method that I (sort of) invented. When I read Havi talk about her being on a pirate ship, I decided that I’m on a train. Old-fashioned yet eco friendly. Steampunky and fun. Hogwarts Express. So now, instead of a to-do list, I make a map of tomorrow’s station stops. Makes it much more likely that I’ll get there, though there are always delays, reroutes, and shortcuts. Anywho, I invite anyone to steal my idea. If you’re a drawing type person, you could even make the map look like a duck, or a flower, or something. Connecting the dots to see what shape your day reveals.

    +Some improvement with partner relations.

    +Instead of spending lots of time beating myself up for not writing, I’ve done some writing this week. Not as much as my Inner Critic thinks I should have done, and maybe not the right kind, but it’s happened.

  19. VickiB says:

    @seagirl: LOL. My house won’t clean itself either. Darn.

    The hard:

    – Low energy and what I have doesn’t last long.
    – Misunderstanding with someone means that something is going to take longer and cost more than I thought.
    – too much time at the computer.
    – not sleeping much, except when I sleep way too much.
    – nearly constant small crampy pains in my legs and back, and lots of tension.

    The good:

    + My brother took care of the front yard, which was bothering me a lot more than I realized until he did the necessary work. Lots of sparklepoints for him!

    I think I mention him kind of a lot. He’s here looking for work and in the meantime is working for us (for minimal pay and room and board) doing all kinds of things that my husband used to do, that I lack strength and necessary skills to do. I’m trying to acquire the skills but I don’t know what to do about the strength and, alas, the height that I lack that gives him leverage in certain tasks.

    + I get to boss him around. Because I’m the big sister, that just comes naturally anyway.

    + Progress on some of the things I’ve not been making progress on. I adopted the One Thing approach (I found it when obsessively browsing the archives). Thanks, Havi.

    + The bad storms missed us. It’s been gray and wet a lot, but today we had beautiful weather. Yay!

    + My husband went out on an errand, leaving me alone in the house so I could put on some music and sing while I did housework (my preferred way of working) and that was just so great! I got a lot done.

    Hugs to everyone. Have a good weekend. Do nice things for yourselves.

  20. Jessica
    Twitter: homeshanti

    Yes, I’m looking for the maker of the Butt Monster too. Where can I find this master of butts?

  21. Mary Tracy
    Twitter: MaryTracy

    I have only just realized why my “monster negotiation” didn’t have the effects I was expecting. Because I have to keep doing it! Doh! I only talked to them “once” and I was expecting everything to go smoothly from then on.

    Thanks for reminding me (again) that the “monster negotiation” is an ongoing process.
    Mary Tracy recently posted… The Royal Wedding PR Angles

  22. Chicken!

    This week’s hard:
    – Lots and lots and lots to do. Serious nose-to-grindstone stuff, and not a lot of time for play.
    – Achy body from sitting for hours and hours on end. Really have to do something about getting some kind of standing desk arrangement one of these days.
    – Seemingly neverending rain and a couple of scary storms earlier this week.

    This week’s good:
    – Even though it was a nutsy busy week, I managed to surf my way through it. I didn’t skip the gym, and even found time to have a delightful and relaxing lunch with my nephew and his girlfriend. They’re so cute.
    – Also got to watch some of the pageantry of yesterday’s wedding on DVR. Call me a sap, but I got up in the middle of the night as a teenager to watch Charles & Diana, and this somehow seemed to bring that full circle. Beauty and optimism and joy in the midst of everything else going on in the world — I can get behind that. And being able to fast-forward through the boring bits: priceless.
    – Three projects out of the blue from contacts I haven’t worked with in a while.
    – It’s finally clearing up. It might even be almost dry enough to cut the grass later.

    Happy weekend, chickeneers!
    Lori Paximadis recently posted… coming out of the cave

  23. Mary Jane Thomas
    Twitter: Mararose10

    What is a Butt Monster?

    The Hard:

    Am really tired and all my body wants to do is rest.

    I have so much I have to get done, this is difficult.

    Panic attacks and migraines. Ugh!

    The Good:

    Lovely inspiring resources like The Fluent Self. Into the Pot and Seven Things. Still using them :-)

    My kind mare carried me so gently on her back, I am softly held and rocked. She knows. Because she can be sassy and spirited, too, and this week, she reined it in without being asked.

    A 70# puppy who thinks she is a lap dog :-)
    Mary Jane Thomas recently posted… Sufism- the Islam of Love and Tolerance

  24. Cerise
    Twitter: rainbowspiritG

    The hard stuff:
    Taking four days off and not knowing if I would be called into office because something went wrong there (it turned out I did not have to go, but waiting for the call spoiled my free days)
    Having tons of stuff i wanted to get done in those four days and feeling overwhelm.
    Spending two days with my love on her couch watching DVDs which is not my favourite thing, even if they were MY Dylan-DVDs.
    Not even started the mermaid painting.
    Not getting around to do some non-cleaning- or furniture-moving-related movement and ending up with serious backpains.
    The good stuff:
    Writing a lot of blog-entries, doing morning pages nearly every day, finishing an art journal page that has been sitting around for some time.
    Had some epiphanies on what direction my blog/homepage thingy might take. Wrote some of it down right away.
    Seriously thinking about my core values.
    Finally moving my book-case from bedroom to livingroom, so that I will be able to put together my new bed which has been sitting in its carton for several weeks now-very patient thingy:-)I am so in love with my bookcase in its new place and how I rearranged my books.
    Did some serious spring-cleaning including my fridge.(I am so not the houshold person, so Yay!)
    Had an early Beltane celebration with my love yesterday. Nearly cried when I had to leave her this morning because she had to work – and loved to FEEL this.

  25. Leocadia says:

    The hard:
    – Throat infection and cough that seems to linger on forever combined with period pain and tiredness.
    – Being married to the biggest procrastinator on this planet.
    – Shoulder still very tense.
    – Woman I am replacing behaves in a way that I can’t quite make head or tail of.
    – No internet access for days and hence missing all the great new posts on this blog.

    The good:
    – The most amazing coincidence brought me a new job after the current one finishes. New job is totally overwhelming and perfect in all regards exept the salary.
    – Having a job interview that wasn’t really a job interview with people who were so welcoming.
    – Coming back to my current job, happy to see people again, people happy to see me.
    – A bit of wellnessing: steam baths, walks in the woods.

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