dear teaching,
i am really looking for some light and ease in these dark days of march. i love my kids. even when they come in the form of dirty-minded 9th grade boys and 7th graders who can’t control their pen-twirling, i love them, and yet i come home from work these days dark-minded and frustrated. i don’t know what i’m doing wrong, and that’s where some light would come in. i want love and light to enter my classroom–joy in my students and ease in my work. some insight into my patterns about what i think they should be doing—>snapping when it isn’t being done immediately–>frustration would be helpful, too, i think.

this could look like: being more relaxed in the classroom. jumping to negative conclusions less easily. smiling more. more student-led classes. a gentler me. i would really love to be gentler in these weeks before break.

my commitment: i could see my way clear to waiting a moment before i tried to yell (i don’t yell, but by golly i snapped at some 7th graders today. gah.). it could mean being less sure about what i had to see from my students. or maybe just being easier on myself about what results i have to see each day.

dear 7th graders,
i GET that you are in 7th grade. i am your teacher because i LOVE you no matter what state of advanced weirdness you are in. but PLEASE, i need your help and cooperation in the classroom. if you could please see your way clear to being helpful, that would be AWESOME.

how this could work: i’d love to find language that seems to GET into their sweet but admittedly mutating little brains to talk to them about mutual responsibility. Ideas WELCOMED. i could also take a moment in time before i jump down their throats about anything. i could be more mirroring of what i’d like to see.

my commitment: gah. this is hard, because i feel like i DO so much. maybe a commitment to pausing one second a few times per class? and see what happens? be open to the idea that something positive might happen?

Oh these are all completely wonderful. Hooray for the VPA!

@Heather – we will definitely have a chat room then. I don’t know if it will help with the flow or not but at least it’s another place for interaction.

@Deanna – a CAPE! No. Way. That is ridiculously great. I can’t even tell you how happy I am to know that.

@everyone – oh you guys you guys thank you for all the birthday ritual ideas, this is absolutely brilliant. mwah!

I want my ‘Diary Project’ art work to be shown in a gallery. The Diary Project is 365 envelopes with drawings on the outside and secrets inside. It’s a cool project & it’s time for the second part (where people get to open the envelopes to reveal the secrets) to happen but I can’t do it by myself, I need help making it happen.

How This Could Happen:
I could just throw it out there to the Universe and trust
I could ask around
I could identify the right galleries and send applications in

My Commitment
I will mention it on Twitter & on my blog and see if I get any leads
I will explore my resistance to making the second part of this project happen
.-= Kirsty Hall´s last post … Goodbye Pepper, Hello Colette =-.

So if we passed a BBQ joint I could impulsively call out, “I would like a pulled pork sandwich!” and Liz would pull over and we would eat there.

It was ridiculous and childlike and fun, and a great way to celebrate. So I highly recommend it. The only thing is you have to tell all your friends so they can help make your wishes happen.

Happy birthday!

And my VPA for March is: I would love a fun, exciting part time job to appear, one that’s so right it doesn’t even seem like a job, it’s just a great way to spend my time with great people and great learning, and it also happens to involve being paid.

Well. An update:

I got amazing, supercalifragilisticexpialidocious help with my Big Scary Debut last Thursday. Better than expected, than dreamed of. Many good things to come from it. So THANK YOU fairies and angels and pirates. Yar!

Now. This week’s VPA. So hard. Never in recent years (“recent” being five) have I needed such help. But I have faith! So. Here we go:

What I want: Some guidance on getting everyone through the Horrible Thing we’re going through.

Ways it could work: Miracles. Pirate or fairy intervention. A very, very good friend. Spirits of the better dead people from my family. A brilliant flash. I’m open. Seriously. I’m open and on my knees, because I am not sure I can take another week of this.

My commitment: To take another week of this. To keep myself strong, but to keep my heart soft. To maybe-possibly literally get on my knees for the first time in a long time. I’m not proud; I just want this moved forward. Oh: and a last thing/first thing, too, where I think of it last thing and wake up with it first thing and always always have pen and paper at the ready.
.-= Colleen Wainwright´s last post … Anatomy of a breakthrough =-.

Here’s my VPA…

Wanted: Songs that would like to be written by me. I love you and long for you. I can hardly wait to share you with the world!

How this can happen: I’m sure I’ve heard you whispering to me as I’ve sat with my guitar or piano. Can you come a little bit closer? I’m listening! Or perhaps you’d like to visit me in dreams. Or would you rather come along for a drive with me? I spend a lot of time in my car, and I’d love your company. Let’s be friends!

My commitment: I will set aside at least fifteen minutes every day to sit in my studio and create a peaceful, playful space into which you may choose to enter. I will carry a journal with me, ready to hold you and keep you safe. You also will have my complete permission to begin as bumbling, toddling, adorable baby songs. You don’t have to be perfect right away, I promise. Let’s grow together!
.-= Kathleen Avins´s last post … This probably shouldn’t surprise me… =-.

–almost all of the men say “Oh, we’re going out to dinner tonight.”
–almost all of the women say “Oh, I’m not going to be doing anything special tonight, but later on//this weekend//next weekend we’ll go out to dinner.”

This pattern freaks me out — I can’t figure it out — and at the same time I find it super-interesting.

Note: I would have never even thought to look for a pattern like this, it’s just that it kept showing up!!

So if it appeals to you, part of the ritual could be to wait a few days and then go do something fun — OR, ritualistically buck the trend (dammit) and do something cool on the day itself!!

VPA: Woman seeks smooth transitions in a smooth sailing sun on her face kind of way. Which means she will enjoy said transitions instead of having panic attacks or hissy fits about them.

Found it interesting that so many are worried about our transitions so I edit my VPA to include all of you. Good luck and smooth sailing to all!

Speaking of transitions. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Havi!!! Not advice but a moment of inspiration reading your post ( I am going to do this as soon as I can, it’s dark out right now so I will wait til it is light out, but I am pouting about having to wait) Blow your bubbles and when you do blow one for each year of your life (so far) and of course one to grow on while envisioning a VPA inside each of them floating off directly to the source or fairy god mother if you will (love that idea) And of course yours get special treatment b/c it’s your Birthday!
So to happy Birthday wishes and very floaty bubbles
-Meg
.-= Meg´s last post … SOFT-LAUNCH 5weeks!!! =-.

How this could work:
Maybe I need to find a treasure map.
Maybe I need to find a good navigator to help me through these waters, either a professional or someone spiritual I trust.
Maybe I need to steal time to spend with these feelings, stop denying they exist and finally learn what they are trying to teach me.
Maybe I need to look at the pile of shoes around me and examine each one individually. Or maybe I just need to hoist them overboard, tied in a sail with an anchor attached.

My commitment:
To lookout for treasure maps, whatever form they may take.
To be open to finding a good navigator.
To give myself permission without judgement to be weak, open, hurting and vulnerable while doing this.
To steal time and a safe cabinspace in which to face this, and not stow it away again.
To remember that this will not last forever even if it hurts now.
To find time to laugh and enjoy my life, because I have so much to celebrate in it that is not this hurt.