This *thing*. Tonight!

What I want:

I would like this *thing* to get wrapped up tonight. I would like all parties to be happy with the results. Even the party in Spain. Very happy.

Ways this could work:

It could just magically happen in the easiest way. How lovely! I could also be patient. Hear everyone out, and either take the weekend to sleep on it. Or be persistent with what I want.

My commitment:

Is to stay level headed. And to continue to be honest and respectful to all parties. And to be patient. A couple more days to think it over is a good thing.

Ah – I feel better. Thanks folks! xo

I really am with you on the “try[ing] to be kind to the hungry person in me who wants something sweet and creamy to make up for the bitter and crunchy dry in my life”. It may help you to know that I’ve found a bit of exercise creates enough serotonin that I no longer feel the need for the sweet creamy stuff (in my case, actually the salty fatty stuff). Also, No Excuses Workouts offer a free daily email encouraging you to exercise that I’ve found really motivating. Give it a go!

Last week: Thanks universe for making the Secret Thing easier to deal with! It was seriously way easier than I thought and not nearly so much angst before and after.

I did not sell any bonbons on Etsy (yet?) but maybe have sold some at the shop. I am okay with that I guess but it is rather discouraging because if that’s my Thing then it is off to a VERY slow start, which is scary. Bleahness~!

This week: I want to be Motivated, damn it! I need to start moving and quit eating chocolate and stop spending so much time on the interwebs (even though I am meeting such wonderful friends as You, dear reader!).

How this could work: I could have a magic reason to get skinny again. I could do just a little each day. Blah, blah blah. Something Motivational could come along and I could suddenly be inspired. Maybe I could read something on the IW that would cause me to spring out of my sloth and start dancing for joy.

My commitment: I will do some Shiva Nata. I will do some other yoga and perhaps take the dog for a walk. I will not open the new box of chocolates TODAY. I will allow myself to be less than perfect and try to be kind to the hungry person in me who wants something sweet and creamy to make up for the bitter and crunchy dry in my life.
.-= chicsinger simone´s last post … royal eagle valentine bonbon brooch =-.

ways this could work: I keep answering her accusing with the sanest and calmest me I can find. I don’t want to poke her too hard, she bites. Actually, I’d like to be able to disengage and be done. But I don’t think she’s done yet.

I can just keep breathing into it
I can try my new Shiva Nata and see if anything else comes up
I can go ride a horse – they can be both challenging and soothing
.-= lee´s last post … What’s next? =-.

I need help putting down the mean sticks I use to beat myself with (metaphor). Help remembering that I am still a good person even with piles of laundry, too many calories and not enough gym.

Ways this could work:

I could make lists of nice things about me
I could ask for hugs
I could pet my lovely kitties who adore me (as long as I feed them)

I DON’T want to ask others to tell me I’m ok, that doesn’t really work, long-term.

Hmmmm

I put my Thing out into the world last week. A small part of the world. I felt sick. I thought – people will laugh, people will scoff. And then I realized that people laughing and scoffing would have been ok. And that the worst thing is for people to do nothing. To just look at my Thing and shrug.

But, it’s out there. And I can keep working on it out in the light and maybe people will start to wonder what I’m tinkering with and come over and say “oh, that’s what that is. I couldn’t tell before. How do I get in on that?”

So, I will commit to not abandoning my Thing or thinking bad thoughts about it or me.

The good thing about putting my Thing out there is that it means I’ve turned on and gassed up the Bridge-Builder-O-Matic and am fiddling with the gears and figuring out the pedals and loading up the supplies and heading over towards the gorge to start building my awesome bridge.

I want a new dining table, too, I have wanted one for quite a while. I just need to “convince” my husband of this. What I like about a nice dining table: it is a wonderful place when you are by yourself, it is a wonderful place to sit together at with friends, best place for yummy home cooked meals or for a tea or a glass of wine, you can put candles and flowers on it. A nice dining table can be the heart of a room. It can bring new life and energy to a room – and hence to oneself. A table can be a home in itself.

Here’s what else I want:
I have an immense urge for decluttering at the moment and have been doing so over the past days (this is 1 1/2 years after the last major decluttering episode and I am constantly going “Why on earth did I keed this or that?”). I keep finding things all the time, mostly photos, that reminds me of a something that I need to let go off. These are painful moments and I would like to find out more about the relationship of my decluttering urge and the letting-go process.
I want to do a painting for the wall above the dinner table that I have had in mind for a long time.
I want to stop putting pressure on myself that “something needs to happen”.

How this can happen:
More work on this letting-go thing during my next session with my therapist.
Try and have next weekend mostly to myself so that I can start on the painting.

My committment:
Tune in with my current rhythm for things and not try and work against it.