Wanted, enough structure that I get stuff done but not so much that I feel confined.

That structure needs to allow me to get work done on my business, spend time with my daughter doing fun stuff and also engaging with her around what she is learning, and do things around the house/farm.

How this could happen: Not sure. I think I’m hoping for magic. But some kind of basic structure could become obvious to me. Or someone could suggest ways of doing this that might work. Other people in my family could offer suggestions for how they’d like me to be available to them and how they could support me spending regular time doing biz stuff.

My commitment: to pay more attention to clues about how this could work and to try things out
.-= JoVE´s last post … Being available, with limits =-.

Dear Universe:

I want to go home. I don’t want to move again only to have to move again. I don’t want to drag my child through another couple of moves, another town (gigantic city), another school . . . I just want to go home with my family, to my family dammit!

Let me explain: my husband is in law school, set to graduate this May – May 2010. We are living in Sacramento because he goes to school here. We are from Austin, Texas. Our whole family and a lifetime of friends are still in Austin. Our now 8-year-old son grew up in Austin, among family, friends and grandparents until two years ago when we moved here to Sac. My husband – I’ll call him B – wants to practice entertainment (specifically music) law. He has a long history with music, he started playing the guitar when he was six, he was in a band for years after high school (and before law school), he lived and breathed music, it was a part of his identity, it’s in his soul – music law is the only method by which he can be happy as an attorney. But!! He’s convinced that in order to get the experience he needs to practice entertainment law in Austin (where we both want to “end up” and raise our family) he first needs to go to Los Angeles and work to make connections and get the big time experience LA offers (ick).

I’ve tried to come to terms with moving to LA (ugh) only to move again at some point back home. It’s proving slightly impossible though, and not least of all because I can’t imagine the stress it’s going to put on our son and it just brakes my heart.

So Here’s what I want:

I want to go home, dammit!
I want to move back to Austin with my family and never have to move again.
I want to be able to grow my roots without the trepidation that comes with the knowledge that they’re going to be ripped out again.
I want my kid to have stability and the ability to grow roots as well.
I want to raise my child(ren) amongst crazy and wonderful family and friends who love and support us.
I want to live among My Peeps; the ones who love and get me.
I don’t want to friggin move again, unless it’s Home.

Ways this could work:

B could get an amazing job offer from an entertainment attorney in Austin who has tons of work and needs a driven, smart, hard-working, perfectionist, musically passionate, insightful, intellectual property minded partner.

B could get some other amazing educational opportunity in Austin with an entertainment/music attorney.

Some other miracle could occur ??

My commitment.

To ask the universe for this crazy thing I want and need.

To cross my fingers and hope like heck.

To love and support B, knowing he’s doing his best to get us home, no matter what happens.

To be open and courageous, to find peace in what comes, and to be kind and patient in the meantime.

Thanks VPA, and thank you Havi, this needed to be said.

Blue, you made me smile.

The Right People thing–that is so right on. My brunch this week is full of so many nifty and lovable people! Really different from the conference I went to last month, which had very nice people, but not many of my Right People. (There were definitely a few.)

Re: days off, yes, I like my life much better when I do that well. I have never in my life been a spa person, but lately I’ve been scheduling massages and soaks and that has been a lifesaver. The whole brunching thing makes it so hard to make time for breaks.
.-= Sonia Simone´s last post … What Makes Marketing Hard? =-.

February and March have no itinerary right now. While in the south of Spain last week, without any heating to speak of, I realized how essential it is for me to be WARM, to be in the SUN, to bask in the LIGHT; for both my heart and my shoulder. It is healing.

I am looking for where I’m meant to spend those two months. I am currently at Findhorn, Scotland (I know, NOT warm, but lots of love and a safe haven over Christmas). I am not skint (broke) nor do I have an unlimited budget. I speak French well enough to get by.

What I am looking for is a place that is:
· not too challenging travel-wise or culture-wise. With the grief process, I am not currently as resilient to high adventure as I have been in the past; I am still ambushed by sadness with unpredictable frequency and intensity.
· beautiful aesthetically (though it may be VERY simple)
· in a healing natural environment, preferably near water. Walking is one of my main therapies for heart and body.
· French and/or English speaking
· perhaps associated with or close to a healing/spiritual/alternative community
· WARM, like Mexico or Caribbean warm or …. How warm IS the south of France in Feb. and March??

Ways this could happen:
· someone who knows someone may know someone who knows of just the right place … I mean, after all, Havi’s right people are awesome and are sprinkled all over the planet … such a resource. And besides, that’s what six degrees of separation is FOR! Dammit!!
· I may stumble across an advert at an airport, or on the net, or in a magazine, or on a bulletin board
· someone may come up to me and say, “I have this problem; I always let out my holiday property in …. Martinique … and the people who were booked in for Feb. and March have had to cancel. I’m really hoping to find someone who can take their place. I’m willing to offer a discount because it is such short notice.”
· God, or some other extra-terrestrial non-local being could write the name of the place on my bedroom wall or
· send an airplane by with the name of the place on a banner in the sky

My commitment is to:
· ask around WIDELY (hence the VPA) the buckshot-universal-guidance approach to problem solving
· grill people that I know at home in Canada who have spent warm winters abroad
· gratefully, diligently and soulfully follow up all leads that come my way
· be open to the possibility that my IDEA of what I need is not exactly the same as the perfect simple solution that the big ole universe of Love might present to me
· deepen my practice of TRUSTING what will unfold; that is, not searching the internet obsessively, not “standing on my tiptoes to peer into the future”, not needing to know before I actually need to know
· respectfully honour and comfort the parts of me that find this practice challenging and/or downright terrifying.

Thank you all for tuning in.
My journey can be tracked by going to http://www.carepages.com , registering, and looking up AnnaCare. That’s where I hang my cyber hat at the moment.

Stitching and felting are complete on the project, it went very smoothly :) All that is left now is backing, binding, and two-three more photos (knitting how-to and author picture).

This week’s asks:
1: That I not freak out over the photo shoot. That it comes out looking at least a little how I picture myself.

How this can happen:
Shiva Nata before I sit for the photo (this worked very well with the newspaper a few weeks ago).

I could put on my “girl drag” and just play with it.

My commitment:
To not judge the final outcome. To have fun with it.

2: That I not freak out when it is packing/shipping time.

How this can happen:
Not waiting until the last minute :)
Asking for help finding the right sized box
ahead of time

My commitment:
To take baby steps each day til it is shipping day so that it is not a freak out when it is time (I guess that is a how this can happen as well)

Yeah, a little focused on getting this project out there, but boy is it awesome and I can’t wait until I can show it to y’all.
.-= Andi´s last post … Wishcasting Wednesday =-.

And now that I feel better, here’s my VPA for the week:

–To continue to prioritize myself and my needs despite 1) feeling better and therefore wanting to DO DO DO 2) embarking on a trip to the in-laws 3) having the holidays sneak up on me. To prioritize myself and my needs EVEN MORE.

How this could happen: I could make reminders for myself. My loved ones could give me non-shaming, non-blaming, non-triggering reminders. I could make artist dates with myself. I could return to journaling. Magic, baby!

My commitment: I will continue to show up and be gentle with myself, both when it works and when it doesn’t. I’ll set my intention and let go of the outcome. I’ll consciously find ways to continue this even while visiting the in-laws and annoyed by the holidays.

Thanks again, Havi, for giving us space to do this!
.-= Julie´s last post … Recovering yourself after academia =-.

How I could do this:
1. Stop spending so much time on the interwebs numbing my stress by reading blogs
2. Organize my time more carefully into little tasks I can complete
3. Take some breaks sometime (not interwebs numbing breaks, but real going out breaks)
4. Set up an electric shock system that zaps me when i goof off. i.e. Force myself to work.

My commitment: To try to defeat the “I tried to work all the time but I have been so stressed out and stuck that I haven’t gotten any work done and am much closer to deadline so i can’t take a break which is stressful and makes me feel stuck so I don’t get work done and now I REALLY can’t take a break” spiral.

Update: Nice flow of new clients- definitely manageable.
Getting more pieces in place including a product put together in just over a weekend. Not ready to have it be a paid product (yet!) but it’s out there- so that’s a big leap right there.
Putting that together gave focus (and a great resource)to my plan for a class in Jan.
And in a completely unexpected bit of magic, Patti Digh linked to one of my posts right before Thanksgiving. The link was great- but mostly because it helped confirm that I’m on the right track. Even if I’m not exactly sure what track that is!

This week’s ask:

Some peace and ease and flow in the next few weeks. Time to do the things that really need doing, the grace to let other things go, and the wisdom to know the difference!

My commitment:
To sit quietly for a few minutes each day (or as long as it takes) to get clear on what really needs to happen.
To shiva it up- in hopes that flow will follow.
To be open to the magic- whenever and wherever it shows up. And to be grateful.
.-= Liz´s last post … Do-Overs and High-Fives… The post-Thanksgiving Gratitude Edition =-.