“If someone throws a shoe at you, it’s about them, not you.”

I love it.

I also agree completely about the naps.
.-= Terry´s last post … How to Forget Him =-.

And some of these tickle intriguingly at me, like my brain says, “Harrumph, yes yes, I know that,” but I feel that tickle in my visceral body-knowing and a wordless curiosity rises up.

For me, Havi, one of those was the one about asking what the functional reason is, for something. I wonder if perhaps sometime you maybe could talk about that?

Thank you, as always, for such a beautiful and resonant post.

And, um, love to Selma. (…don’t know why, but I’m really kind of shy about her.)

A few more, some from Havi:

You are not always the one to blame when things go wrong.If you can’t completely control the situation, then you can’t be completely responsible for it. And you can never really control other people.

You can give yourself permission to do things.

You can move as slowly or as quickly as feels right.

Other people, in general, are not psychic and cannot read your mind – you can ask for what you want.

Taking care of yourself is not selfish.

Be kind to yourself.

Cut Yourself Some F*cking Slack.

Let others take responsibility for their half of their relationship.

You are responsible for you, Gracie [my 5 year old] and Adia [my cat]. That’s it. You’re responsible *to* other people, but not for them.

Shut up and listen.

Making money would be a good thing for you business to do.
.-= Elizabeth Potts Weinstein´s last post … Living Your Truth And School Skipping: A Crazy Dude’s Story =-.

I have also (huh!) been thinking about knowing and knowing. A big part of my project is exploring how being less certain can be a key to peace. Currently, I’m applying that to all knowings and seeing what happens.

Plus I was saying over and over to myself, ‘Everything you know is wrong,’ as I read down the page and read, ‘Everything you know is wrong.’

Spooky. Funny.
.-= Andrew Lightheart´s last post … Aaah, grow up already. =-.

Something I know/believe but need to keep reminding myself?

Our belief systems function like a lens that sits between us and our world. What we see is filtered through that lens. If we want something to be different in our world we can evaluate the lens, the belief systems, and make a change there. And then suddenly our world has changed. But really, the world was always the same. It is we who have changed, and by doing so made our experience of our world completely different.

Which is perfectly described in The Matrix by the boy who says, “Do not try and bend the spoon. That’s impossible. Instead only try to realise the truth…There is no spoon…Then you will see, it’s not the spoon that bends. It is only yourself.”

Just something I like to think about when I’m trying to move out of the stuck… :)

Here are a couple of thoughts that have served me well:

1. Showing up really is half the battle. In fact, often, it’s almost all of the battle. So many times when I was anxious and dreading something, just getting myself to leave the house and get there was by far the hardest part, and the actual experience turned out to be so much easier than my fearful imaginings.

2. Some advice that my mother-in-law gave me, years ago: Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by ignorance. (The word she actually used was “stupidity”, which is funnier, but I’m opting for language that feels more compassionate to me, here in this very compassionate space.) In other words, very often, people who may appear to be mean are really just lacking in understanding, and have no idea that they are hurting anyone. Besides, whether or not that’s true in any given situation, whenever there’s no way of knowing, I feel much happier if I can give others the benefit of the doubt.

P.S. @ Anna-Liza: I like that!
.-= Kathleen Avins´s last post … Still waking up =-.

I was looking at my monster manual last night, and practiced recognizing the various types, seeing it from their side, from my side, talking to them a tiny bit. At the same time I had the movie ‘The Snake Pit’ with Oliva DeHavilland playing in the background. The one where she plays a mentally ill woman who is put into an institution. Because old movies comfort me?

OMG monsters. My monsters, other people’s monsters. I put a monster print up at work, on the hallway door (to of course, ward off monsters), it is my gargoyle. Experiencing horrible, horrible growing pains in our business, some days it actually feels excruciatingly painful. Some days it feels swell! Go figure *gulp*.

I’m going to print your blog and read it at night. Especially this post – which is so awesome I can barely stand it. I never get to let it sink in, but there is just way too much wisdom contained, and I need to catch up. Looking forward to the Shiva Nata handbook! Looking forward to a live in-person Havi event someday! Bless you and thank you for your wonderful wonderful blog.