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	<title>Comments on: Very Personal Ads #15: in search of the zing</title>
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	<link>http://www.fluentself.com/blog/personal/very-personal-ads-in-search-of-the-zing/</link>
	<description>When you need some destuckification.</description>
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		<title>By: Alicia</title>
		<link>http://www.fluentself.com/blog/personal/very-personal-ads-in-search-of-the-zing/comment-page-1/#comment-8999</link>
		<dc:creator>Alicia</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 14 Oct 2009 04:17:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.fluentself.com/?p=6056#comment-8999</guid>
		<description>oof - all the zingy things I can think of have potential triggers: self-rule, self-prioritization, (and now I&#039;m realizing that anything with &quot;self&quot; in it makes me feel selfish. agh!) In some ways, &quot;sovreignty&quot; is nice because it&#039;s unusual enough not to have rubbed up against any ick. Gentle Art of Assertion? Remedial Asking? Standing Firm? &quot;Asking for what you want without feeling like an asshat&quot; is nicely descriptive. The positive of that would be &quot;Feel good asking for what you want.&quot; The guiltless ask?

Today, I am asking for some good concentrated time tomorrow to roll around in the survey data I collected and absorb it such that I can summarize it for the presentation I&#039;m giving on Monday. I know it&#039;s good and people want it; I just need to get started in the morning instead of avoiding it. 
How this could happen: I could drop off kids, walk dogs, big mug of tea and start with a quadrant analysis before I look at my personal email. I could be magically inspired in the shower tomorrow or on the way home from the daycare dropoff.
My commitment:I&#039;ll have a rough draft for review by tomorrow evening. It doesn&#039;t have to be good yet.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>oof &#8211; all the zingy things I can think of have potential triggers: self-rule, self-prioritization, (and now I&#8217;m realizing that anything with &#8220;self&#8221; in it makes me feel selfish. agh!) In some ways, &#8220;sovreignty&#8221; is nice because it&#8217;s unusual enough not to have rubbed up against any ick. Gentle Art of Assertion? Remedial Asking? Standing Firm? &#8220;Asking for what you want without feeling like an asshat&#8221; is nicely descriptive. The positive of that would be &#8220;Feel good asking for what you want.&#8221; The guiltless ask?</p>
<p>Today, I am asking for some good concentrated time tomorrow to roll around in the survey data I collected and absorb it such that I can summarize it for the presentation I&#8217;m giving on Monday. I know it&#8217;s good and people want it; I just need to get started in the morning instead of avoiding it.<br />
How this could happen: I could drop off kids, walk dogs, big mug of tea and start with a quadrant analysis before I look at my personal email. I could be magically inspired in the shower tomorrow or on the way home from the daycare dropoff.<br />
My commitment:I&#8217;ll have a rough draft for review by tomorrow evening. It doesn&#8217;t have to be good yet.</p>
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		<title>By: JoVE</title>
		<link>http://www.fluentself.com/blog/personal/very-personal-ads-in-search-of-the-zing/comment-page-1/#comment-8990</link>
		<dc:creator>JoVE</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 13 Oct 2009 22:29:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.fluentself.com/?p=6056#comment-8990</guid>
		<description>the sovereignty series sounds fab. NO ideas about zingy titles but if you need reassurance that readers want to read it, here I am reassuring.

I need to find that relationship with moving my body. Got busy. Lost that. Need to get back into it. So clearly I have no advice but am eagerly watching what is happening for you and reminding myself that this would be a good thing.

Also realize I have completely lost the plot on the KT classes.
.-= JoVE&#180;s last blog ..&lt;a href=&quot;http://jovanevery.ca/2009/10/dont-let-obligation-get-you-down/&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;Don’t let obligation get you down&lt;/a&gt; =-.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>the sovereignty series sounds fab. NO ideas about zingy titles but if you need reassurance that readers want to read it, here I am reassuring.</p>
<p>I need to find that relationship with moving my body. Got busy. Lost that. Need to get back into it. So clearly I have no advice but am eagerly watching what is happening for you and reminding myself that this would be a good thing.</p>
<p>Also realize I have completely lost the plot on the KT classes.<br />
.-= JoVE&#180;s last blog ..<a href="http://jovanevery.ca/2009/10/dont-let-obligation-get-you-down/" rel="nofollow">Don’t let obligation get you down</a> =-.</p>
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		<title>By: Janice Cartier</title>
		<link>http://www.fluentself.com/blog/personal/very-personal-ads-in-search-of-the-zing/comment-page-1/#comment-8963</link>
		<dc:creator>Janice Cartier</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 12 Oct 2009 22:28:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.fluentself.com/?p=6056#comment-8963</guid>
		<description>Hm.. Havi...pirate ships and sovereignty...here&#039;s the thing... most sailing vessels sail under the sovereignty of their country&#039;s flag...except  pirate ships.. they came up with the &quot;Jolly Roger&quot;, or masked themselves temporarily with a flag from a &quot;convenient&quot; sovereign state when they were out well, doing pirate things...so somewhere.. in picking  a pirate&#039;s &quot;sovereign&quot; flag, or choosing colors, or what to put on such a personal sailing banner to hoist up the mast so to speak...maybe somewhere in all of that there is something for you...Heraldry  is the same..picking out a visual, hm..crest to carry the mantra we hold most dear...Just some thoughts. 

A sovereign is also a piece of gold is it not?

In any case, personal sovereignty...yes, A very intriguing series that will be.

And you have a lovely name for it, sovereignty,  being in liege to ourselves, non?

I add my wishes for your smooth and graceful slide into a rhythm that you can dance with bliss.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Hm.. Havi&#8230;pirate ships and sovereignty&#8230;here&#8217;s the thing&#8230; most sailing vessels sail under the sovereignty of their country&#8217;s flag&#8230;except  pirate ships.. they came up with the &#8220;Jolly Roger&#8221;, or masked themselves temporarily with a flag from a &#8220;convenient&#8221; sovereign state when they were out well, doing pirate things&#8230;so somewhere.. in picking  a pirate&#8217;s &#8220;sovereign&#8221; flag, or choosing colors, or what to put on such a personal sailing banner to hoist up the mast so to speak&#8230;maybe somewhere in all of that there is something for you&#8230;Heraldry  is the same..picking out a visual, hm..crest to carry the mantra we hold most dear&#8230;Just some thoughts. </p>
<p>A sovereign is also a piece of gold is it not?</p>
<p>In any case, personal sovereignty&#8230;yes, A very intriguing series that will be.</p>
<p>And you have a lovely name for it, sovereignty,  being in liege to ourselves, non?</p>
<p>I add my wishes for your smooth and graceful slide into a rhythm that you can dance with bliss.</p>
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		<title>By: Havi Brooks</title>
		<link>http://www.fluentself.com/blog/personal/very-personal-ads-in-search-of-the-zing/comment-page-1/#comment-8961</link>
		<dc:creator>Havi Brooks</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 12 Oct 2009 21:31:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.fluentself.com/?p=6056#comment-8961</guid>
		<description>&lt;img src=&quot;http://fluentself.com/images/blog/ducks/Selma_tinyW.png&quot;&gt; As always I have to say that these are all amazing. I LOVE reading people&#039;s ads. 

Thanks for the enthusiastic responses about a Sovereignty Series and for all the accompanying namestorming. Appreciated!

@Inge - yeah, it&#039;s also a really bizarre thing to say in English! 

Which is kind of why I worry about it -- I didn&#039;t understand the concept at all until Hiro explained it to me, and even now I still have the sense that it floats in and out of my consciousness. Sometimes it&#039;s more clear to me and sometimes it&#039;s somewhat less so. Queenship is kind of cool. 

@spiralsongkat - yay for you! Also nice Documenting Of The Process there. I wish for you the exact right silk pajamas, who will know instinctively that you are the one to treat them right and love them up. :)

@Carol - wow. WOW. “Wanted: The courage to reveal that I do NOT always have all the answers.” Yeah! That&#039;s a wonderfully brave ask, if you ask me. 

@Angela - Rocket Dogs! Rocket Dogs!

This whole thing is so, so great.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://fluentself.com/images/blog/ducks/Selma_tinyW.png"/> As always I have to say that these are all amazing. I LOVE reading people&#8217;s ads. </p>
<p>Thanks for the enthusiastic responses about a Sovereignty Series and for all the accompanying namestorming. Appreciated!</p>
<p>@Inge &#8211; yeah, it&#8217;s also a really bizarre thing to say in English! </p>
<p>Which is kind of why I worry about it &#8212; I didn&#8217;t understand the concept at all until Hiro explained it to me, and even now I still have the sense that it floats in and out of my consciousness. Sometimes it&#8217;s more clear to me and sometimes it&#8217;s somewhat less so. Queenship is kind of cool. </p>
<p>@spiralsongkat &#8211; yay for you! Also nice Documenting Of The Process there. I wish for you the exact right silk pajamas, who will know instinctively that you are the one to treat them right and love them up. :)</p>
<p>@Carol &#8211; wow. WOW. “Wanted: The courage to reveal that I do NOT always have all the answers.” Yeah! That&#8217;s a wonderfully brave ask, if you ask me. </p>
<p>@Angela &#8211; Rocket Dogs! Rocket Dogs!</p>
<p>This whole thing is so, so great.</p>
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		<title>By: jojo</title>
		<link>http://www.fluentself.com/blog/personal/very-personal-ads-in-search-of-the-zing/comment-page-1/#comment-8938</link>
		<dc:creator>jojo</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 12 Oct 2009 09:47:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.fluentself.com/?p=6056#comment-8938</guid>
		<description>sovereign-essence - &#039;so very&#039; essence - sovereignessence???

Does these help? My VPA ad worked for me, so if it&#039;s helpful, it&#039;s the least I can do to help. Looking forward to reading the posts, whatever they are called!</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>sovereign-essence &#8211; &#8216;so very&#8217; essence &#8211; sovereignessence???</p>
<p>Does these help? My VPA ad worked for me, so if it&#8217;s helpful, it&#8217;s the least I can do to help. Looking forward to reading the posts, whatever they are called!</p>
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		<title>By: Inge</title>
		<link>http://www.fluentself.com/blog/personal/very-personal-ads-in-search-of-the-zing/comment-page-1/#comment-8937</link>
		<dc:creator>Inge</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 12 Oct 2009 09:44:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.fluentself.com/?p=6056#comment-8937</guid>
		<description>Definitely diggin&#039; the plans for sovereignty posts! Since I&#039;m not a native speaker and the word does not mean that much to me, I&#039;ve been looking for synonyms. I&#039;m liking (self-)reign, queenship/queenhood, captainship. Also: glory, omniscience

Source: http://freethesaurus.net/s.php?q=sovereignty

&lt;i&gt;My own ask&lt;/i&gt; is this: clarity about what type of job/company/work thing would fit me. Or what kind of work I want to do. Or what would absolutely definitely be the wrong way for me. Or even what to ask for regarding this topic. And to find time to think about it without freaking out.
&lt;i&gt;How this could happen&lt;/i&gt;: I could read/see/hear something that inspires me. Something that rings true to me. Or any other way that I haven&#039;t thought of.
&lt;i&gt;My commitment&lt;/i&gt;: I&#039;ll be open to ideas and suggestions from anywhere and make the &#039;finding out what to do next&#039; a priority.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Definitely diggin&#8217; the plans for sovereignty posts! Since I&#8217;m not a native speaker and the word does not mean that much to me, I&#8217;ve been looking for synonyms. I&#8217;m liking (self-)reign, queenship/queenhood, captainship. Also: glory, omniscience</p>
<p>Source: <a href="http://freethesaurus.net/s.php?q=sovereignty" rel="nofollow">http://freethesaurus.net/s.php?q=sovereignty</a></p>
<p><i>My own ask</i> is this: clarity about what type of job/company/work thing would fit me. Or what kind of work I want to do. Or what would absolutely definitely be the wrong way for me. Or even what to ask for regarding this topic. And to find time to think about it without freaking out.<br />
<i>How this could happen</i>: I could read/see/hear something that inspires me. Something that rings true to me. Or any other way that I haven&#8217;t thought of.<br />
<i>My commitment</i>: I&#8217;ll be open to ideas and suggestions from anywhere and make the &#8216;finding out what to do next&#8217; a priority.</p>
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		<title>By: Carina (@chalcara)</title>
		<link>http://www.fluentself.com/blog/personal/very-personal-ads-in-search-of-the-zing/comment-page-1/#comment-8935</link>
		<dc:creator>Carina (@chalcara)</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 12 Oct 2009 08:52:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.fluentself.com/?p=6056#comment-8935</guid>
		<description>Erh...&lt;/strong&gt; There. sorry, forgot to close a tag.
.-= Carina (@chalcara)&#180;s last blog ..&lt;a href=&quot;http://www.imaginaryskies.net/2009/10/abandoned-powerplant-photos-of/&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;Abandoned Powerplant; photos of&lt;/a&gt; =-.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Erh&#8230; There. sorry, forgot to close a tag.<br />
.-= Carina (@chalcara)&#180;s last blog ..<a href="http://www.imaginaryskies.net/2009/10/abandoned-powerplant-photos-of/" rel="nofollow">Abandoned Powerplant; photos of</a> =-.</p>
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		<title>By: Carina (@chalcara)</title>
		<link>http://www.fluentself.com/blog/personal/very-personal-ads-in-search-of-the-zing/comment-page-1/#comment-8934</link>
		<dc:creator>Carina (@chalcara)</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 12 Oct 2009 08:50:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.fluentself.com/?p=6056#comment-8934</guid>
		<description>Yup. Sovereignety + Biggification. I, too, am really looking forward to those articles.

Thanks for giving us the oppertunity to post these adds, Havi.

&lt;strong&gt;Update on previous per-ads:&lt;/strong&gt;
I kept on practising WuWei and yes, I find it in more and more situation. I still need to regulary remind myself to step into a situation, but it&#039;s worth it. One of the most freeing experiences I&#039;ve ever made in my live. Additionally: WuWei + Sovereignety = lots of epiphanies.

&lt;strong&gt;Thing 1: webdesign&lt;/strong&gt;
I&#039;m redesigning the webpage for my comic, to reflect the changes I made on it.

What I want: 
An open, spacious, elegant, easy to use and most importantly welcoming page design. I want my readers to feel comfortable with spending their time on this page and I want to keep the reading experience smooth and simple - more like paging through a graphic novel instead of using a webpage. The page is supposed to help the potential readers grow attached to the comic and the characters and to archive that comic needs to be the main-focus. Did I mention it has to be easy to use?

How it could happen:
Inspiration could strike. It sometimes does, you know? Additionally I could find a webpage, or a house or maybe something else that encompasses exactly what I am looking forward. I could find an (for me) affordable webdesigner who can work in the style I want.

My commitment:
I keep on working on the design. And this time I&#039;ll finish my prelimary sketches before I jump headfirst into the programming stuff.

&lt;strong&gt;Thing 2: More personal presense

What I want:
To be here in the now more. To be able to feel my life instead of only analyizing it.

How it could happen:
Things could happen that remind me to check in with myself more. I could remember to check in without external prompt. Or I plain and simple stay in the now longer, which would mean my mind waits a bit longer till it starts to wander again.

My commitment:
I&#039;ll return to the Now when I realize my mind drifted off again.
.-= Carina (@chalcara)&#180;s last blog ..&lt;a href=&quot;http://www.imaginaryskies.net/2009/10/abandoned-powerplant-photos-of/&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;Abandoned Powerplant; photos of&lt;/a&gt; =-.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Yup. Sovereignety + Biggification. I, too, am really looking forward to those articles.</p>
<p>Thanks for giving us the oppertunity to post these adds, Havi.</p>
<p><strong>Update on previous per-ads:</strong><br />
I kept on practising WuWei and yes, I find it in more and more situation. I still need to regulary remind myself to step into a situation, but it&#8217;s worth it. One of the most freeing experiences I&#8217;ve ever made in my live. Additionally: WuWei + Sovereignety = lots of epiphanies.</p>
<p><strong>Thing 1: webdesign</strong><br />
I&#8217;m redesigning the webpage for my comic, to reflect the changes I made on it.</p>
<p>What I want:<br />
An open, spacious, elegant, easy to use and most importantly welcoming page design. I want my readers to feel comfortable with spending their time on this page and I want to keep the reading experience smooth and simple &#8211; more like paging through a graphic novel instead of using a webpage. The page is supposed to help the potential readers grow attached to the comic and the characters and to archive that comic needs to be the main-focus. Did I mention it has to be easy to use?</p>
<p>How it could happen:<br />
Inspiration could strike. It sometimes does, you know? Additionally I could find a webpage, or a house or maybe something else that encompasses exactly what I am looking forward. I could find an (for me) affordable webdesigner who can work in the style I want.</p>
<p>My commitment:<br />
I keep on working on the design. And this time I&#8217;ll finish my prelimary sketches before I jump headfirst into the programming stuff.</p>
<p><strong>Thing 2: More personal presense</p>
<p>What I want:<br />
To be here in the now more. To be able to feel my life instead of only analyizing it.</p>
<p>How it could happen:<br />
Things could happen that remind me to check in with myself more. I could remember to check in without external prompt. Or I plain and simple stay in the now longer, which would mean my mind waits a bit longer till it starts to wander again.</p>
<p>My commitment:<br />
I&#8217;ll return to the Now when I realize my mind drifted off again.<br />
.-= Carina (@chalcara)&#180;s last blog ..<a href="http://www.imaginaryskies.net/2009/10/abandoned-powerplant-photos-of/" rel="nofollow">Abandoned Powerplant; photos of</a> =-.</strong></p>
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		<title>By: Rachel</title>
		<link>http://www.fluentself.com/blog/personal/very-personal-ads-in-search-of-the-zing/comment-page-1/#comment-8933</link>
		<dc:creator>Rachel</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 12 Oct 2009 06:03:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.fluentself.com/?p=6056#comment-8933</guid>
		<description>How about &#039;queen over all she surveys&#039;.  Might get a bit tricky if you want to be gender neutral.  Regardless, it&#039;s a great topic idea and I would really appreciate hearing your thoughts and guidance on it.  Definitely a huge issue for me this year as well.  Thanks!</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>How about &#8216;queen over all she surveys&#8217;.  Might get a bit tricky if you want to be gender neutral.  Regardless, it&#8217;s a great topic idea and I would really appreciate hearing your thoughts and guidance on it.  Definitely a huge issue for me this year as well.  Thanks!</p>
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		<title>By: spiralsongkat</title>
		<link>http://www.fluentself.com/blog/personal/very-personal-ads-in-search-of-the-zing/comment-page-1/#comment-8931</link>
		<dc:creator>spiralsongkat</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 12 Oct 2009 03:41:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.fluentself.com/?p=6056#comment-8931</guid>
		<description>I&#039;m very excited about this whole sovereignty odyssey.  It &lt;i&gt;is&lt;/i&gt; hot!  Smokin&#039;!

As I&#039;ve been trying to choose a personal ad among the many possibilities orbiting my psyche, the one that keeps popping up is &lt;i&gt;silk pajamas&lt;/i&gt;.  Try as I might to nudge that wish aside (oh, come on, Kat!  That&#039;s far too self-indulgent, trivial and materialistic!) it simply will not be budged.  Thus, I surrender.

&lt;b&gt;My ask&lt;/b&gt;:  A pair of silk pajamas, comfy and sensual, in a flattering jewel-tone.

&lt;b&gt;How this could happen&lt;/b&gt;:  I could stumble across an incredible deal somewhere.  Someone could give me some as a gift.  I could have a small windfall, and give them to myself.  I could find them in a basket on my front porch, with a note attached:  &quot;Please give these pajamas a loving home.&quot;  &lt;i&gt;I&lt;/i&gt; don&#039;t know!  I&#039;m open to all kinds of possibilities.

&lt;b&gt;My commitment&lt;/b&gt;:  I will wear them often, and enjoy them, and be very grateful.  When I&#039;m at home, I&#039;ll even work in them.  Who knows, they could even become a physical signifier for me:  sovereignty is a pair of silk pajamas!

There!  I&#039;m glad I took the time to post this today.
.-= spiralsongkat&#180;s last blog ..&lt;a href=&quot;http://spiralsongkat.wordpress.com/2009/10/09/wishin-and-hopin-and-freakin-and-copin/&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;Wishin’, and hopin’, and freakin’, and copin’…&lt;/a&gt; =-.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I&#8217;m very excited about this whole sovereignty odyssey.  It <i>is</i> hot!  Smokin&#8217;!</p>
<p>As I&#8217;ve been trying to choose a personal ad among the many possibilities orbiting my psyche, the one that keeps popping up is <i>silk pajamas</i>.  Try as I might to nudge that wish aside (oh, come on, Kat!  That&#8217;s far too self-indulgent, trivial and materialistic!) it simply will not be budged.  Thus, I surrender.</p>
<p><b>My ask</b>:  A pair of silk pajamas, comfy and sensual, in a flattering jewel-tone.</p>
<p><b>How this could happen</b>:  I could stumble across an incredible deal somewhere.  Someone could give me some as a gift.  I could have a small windfall, and give them to myself.  I could find them in a basket on my front porch, with a note attached:  &#8220;Please give these pajamas a loving home.&#8221;  <i>I</i> don&#8217;t know!  I&#8217;m open to all kinds of possibilities.</p>
<p><b>My commitment</b>:  I will wear them often, and enjoy them, and be very grateful.  When I&#8217;m at home, I&#8217;ll even work in them.  Who knows, they could even become a physical signifier for me:  sovereignty is a pair of silk pajamas!</p>
<p>There!  I&#8217;m glad I took the time to post this today.<br />
.-= spiralsongkat&#180;s last blog ..<a href="http://spiralsongkat.wordpress.com/2009/10/09/wishin-and-hopin-and-freakin-and-copin/" rel="nofollow">Wishin’, and hopin’, and freakin’, and copin’…</a> =-.</p>
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