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Each week I write these VPAs to practice asking for what I want. And to get clarity on what that really is, even when asking feels conflicted.

I always get useful information about my relationship with various aspects of the ask. Join in if you like!

VPAs are late this week because I was out fulfilling a wish made here a few weeks ago: to drop everything when the sun comes out and go be in the sun.

And that was lovely. Normally I would have stayed in and grumbled. But I didn’t.

Thanks, me from two-weeks-ago for setting that up. You’re the best.

Anyway, Very Personal Ads. Let’s do this.

Thing 1: Flexibility.

Here’s what I want:

A sense of expansiveness. A freedom of movement that comes into every aspect of my day.

I’m not sure if I can say more about it than that, but I’m reminded of an interview I read with the founder of Tumblr who refused to schedule meetings, because what if you wanted to be doing something more fun?!


Also, last week slightly future me told me that the version of me me who is okay with [X thing I want] is the me who knows about flexibility. So that’s interesting too.

Ways this could work:

Dropping everything and heading to the park.

Doing my yoga practice in the garden, like I did this weekend.

There is also something in here about setting up structures and forms that ALLOW for unstructured play, but I don’t know how that works yet.

I could also have my phone call with A in the garden.

I can look for a clew in the novel I’m reading.

And I can spend more time talking to Flexible Me.

I’ll play with…

Canceling appointments.

Lots of yoga.

Being willing to be wrong.

Thing 2: Knee-length skirts.

Here’s what I want:

Pretty, comfortable, non-see-through knee-length skirts for wearing to the park!

Ideally they have pockets and can be rolled up into a bag. But not too sporty. A skirt-like skirt. But no ruffly bits or frills. Just a skirt.

Definitely not something that needs to be ironed or dry-cleaned or otherwise given attention.

I don’t really care about the material. Filmy is okay if not see-through.
And I feel happy wearing them.

I may have to have another conversation with the “you’re too fussy” monsters about how knowing what you want is the superpower of Discernment..

Ways this could work:

Maybe someone here has a place for skirts. Or even a skirt in mind.

Maybe I stumble upon the just-right thing.

Maybe the skirt and I find each other.

I’ll play with…

Asking my friend Rebecca for suggestions. She knows about things like this.

Wanting what I want.

Being receptive to the idea that something about this is important because I want it, and remembering that I do not need to know yet what that something is.

Thing 3: Stop, drop and picnic.

Here’s what I want:

To keep going to the park/garden whenever I feel drawn to.

Ways this could work:

Automatic Internal Permission Slip.

* It’s just one guy!

I’ll play with…

Testing it out.

Thing 4: [Silent Retreat!]

Here’s what I want:

I’m going on silent retreat on this one, but this particular ask has to do with confidence, grace and equanimity.

Ways this could work:

Interviewing slightly future me.

Doing an OOD.

Using the Floating Playground for support.

I’ll play with…

Asking lots of questions and skipping some stones.

And doing Shiva Nata on it, of course.

Progress report on past Very Personal Ads.

Just to update you on what’s happened since last time.

Last week I did ten wishes and asked four questions. The question-asking was super-useful!

I also liked using secret agent code for the wishes. That helped too.

Let’s see. Seven of them came true, and three are still in progress. Feeling pretty good about that, and I will re-plant the three that need some love.

Play-filled comment zen. Here’s what I’d love today.

  • Wanted: Your own personal ads, small or large. Updates on past ones if you like.
  • You can also do these on your own or in your head. You can always call silent retreat!
  • Leave your gwishes! Throw things in the pot!
  • Things we try to keep away from: the word “manifest”, telling people how they should be asking for things, unsolicited advice.
  • VPA amnesty applies, of course. Leave yours any time between now and next Sunday (or whenever, really) — it’s all fine by us!