Friday chickenIn which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of ritual and self-reflection.

And you get to join in if you feel like it.

Yet again I have absolutely no idea how it is Friday, and actually I feel a little bit disoriented by how not-Friday everything feels.

But here we are. Let’s peek.

The hard stuff

And the stupid part is that I didn’t even have the flu.

You know that thing that happens after you have the flu and you’re recovering, and everything sucks?

Because: you are tired. And cranky. And everything takes longer and feels heavier. Also things you normally like weigh you down.

And things you normally don’t mind are not fun.

This week felt exactly like that, except I didn’t have the flu so I wasn’t recovering from it.

It wasn’t like being depressed at all, it was EXACTLY like recovering from flu.

Ugh. Labor day.

It just felt like a sick day.

Stayed in bed.

I like this but I kind of wish that I didn’t.

Found out that someone I like used to skateboard, you guys!

Skateboarding is some serious Havi Catnip. I may like this person a little bit too much right now. I wish I did not have this piece of information!

Trying not to think about it. Lalalalalalala pancakes. As Lisa would say.

Stood up at three different appointments.

I have nothing to say about this.

Unbelievably unproductive.

May have reached new levels of not getting stuff done.

That’s what happens when you take a break from shiva nata.

And also when you have imaginary-flu that you are recovering from.

And also when you need a vacation.

Not taking iron.

This is not good.

Worried about something and can’t do anything about it.

But still worrying.

I am so upset about this!

My favorite place in town, now my least favorite place in town, is where I go for an amazing massage when I really, really, really needed that.

Their stuff is not inexpensive but they do deals on occasion. This year I gave myself a birthday gift of twelve treatments, to be spread out at delicious intervals. For meeee!

And the second one was supposed to be this week but they didn’t call me to confirm so I called them. Phone disconnected. They’re closed.

They’ve been in business for over a decade. Did not see this coming.

So yes, I’m upset that I paid for 12 treatments and only had one of them. But really I am more upset that they didn’t even, I don’t know, send an apology email. I mean, ANYTHING. Just to, I don’t know, acknowledge how awful it is.

And this is somehow worse because all summer long I have been comforting myself with the thought that yes, things are challenging right now but later I am going to have the best massage ever and have hot oil put in my hair and I will be happy.

And now none of those things are going to happen and my favorite place a) doesn’t exist and b) I don’t like them. Upset!

Also, didn’t this just happen? Oh, three years ago? And no, that situation never got resolved. The Better Business Bureau was useless, everyone we talked to was useless, we never got our mail. If you were still wondering.

The not-good news is still not-good news.

I want this to change please!

For the better, please.

The good stuff

I am okay.

This is not new but this week it was a very big deal.

And: I remembered that I am okay, and this was also a big deal.

Plum Duff! Plum Duff!

Plum Duff is something we do in the business maybe once a year that I would like to do more often. It’s not really a sale but it’s better than a sale!

Oh man, it was so much work to make it happen. But we pulled it off.

And now it is Plum Duff, and Plum Duff is the best, and I will tell you more about this when I make my announcement in the announcing part.

This is my favorite thing that we do. It makes for so many happy people and I get to be a part of it, and also it spreads hope and joyfulness and possibility. These are important things.

Ohmygod. The beautiful things people have been saying about Plum duff!

This is a very good reminder for me because I tend to think that people are all, oh right, that thing I wanted, now I will get it.

But they are so excited!

People all over the world who can’t come to the Playground are getting buttmonsters to squeeze, all through the magical door that is Plum Duff. Password: heaveaway

Anyway, the people who are getting Plum Duff stuff are so so so happy that it’s Plum Duff time. They are saying the most wonderful things in the shopping cart. The First Mate forwarded to me!

Like this:

“Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you x eleventy with extra special bounces for the plum duff toy shop specialness!!”

My heart is full of love and gladness. Thank you for reminding me.

I became a dragon this week!

Maybe I will tell you guys the story some time. It has to do with ritual and play, two of my favorite things.

It was cool. I now have the superpowers of many, many knights.

And the golden goblets.

Shiva Nata and wonder and delight.

I ran a training this week for an injured roller derby player, and it was AWESOME.

A new verb.

Of course. To play shiva nata. That is correct. Why did I not realize this before?

Then I played shiva nata, and everything was better.

All the ideas! I have all the ideas!

Amazing shiva nata that turned into a children’s book! And more.

I was playing with words and playing shiva nata, with my body and brain at the same time, and the words turned themselves into a story!:

So now we’re going to turn shiva nata into children’s stories. Into a shivanautical generator for children’s stories. And illustrate them.

Genius! Fun. Play. Adore. More on this to come.


There was comfort this week.

Thank you, Floop.

Thank you, Marisa. Thank you, Chuck. Thank you, everyone who showed up.

Havi’s playmate: Of course. Even when you’re sad.
Havi: That’s fortunate, because I have kind of a lot of sad.
Playmate: I have kind of a lot of “will sit with you and be with you.”


This was a week of playdate after playdate.

I think I said that last week too?

I like to play. I like to play like this. I like how it’s always different and always surprising and always new.


Playdate Unplugged.


Because everything is better unplugged.

But in this case: literally unplugging the plugs.

I will stop explaining now.

I am taking today off.

Unplugged. Again.

I am feeling hopeful about things that I was not feeling hopeful about before.


The invention of the Cuddle Sutra.

There are many new sutras in the Cuddle Sutra.

I am going to be the expert in the arts of Imaginary Snuggling come winter.

Is this a proxy? It might be….

Rally is this coming week! Monday!

God I love Rally.


The fun part of the Chickening happens here.

Tabstravaganza! Or: what’s Havi been up to with all those open Firefox tabs?

  • I am surproused. Very surproused! By so many things right now.
  • These opinions overlap with mine way more than they should. These are actually the right opinions. Oh, the Onion.
  • Black Hockey Jesus, still someone I love and care about. And the only person who could write a review of his daughter reading to him.
  • The AV club is doing their wonderful “get a bunch of amazing people to cover songs” thing again, and I love this and also I am so in love with Sharon Van Etten. As you know. My favorites this round were hers, obviously and this one (I have a known weakness for ridiculously skinny men singing), and also Memoryhouse doing the Police. It’s wonderful. People doing the magic thing that happens when you get together and SUDDENLY-MUSIC. The sad part is that you have to put up with Starbucks ads, and I loathe Starbucks more than I could possibly ever describe to you. And, as with anywhere-on-the-internet-that-is-not-here, avoid the comments.

Playing live at the meme beach house — it’s the Fake Band of the Week!

Background? Ez and I make up bands. Stu (retired Bolshevik-fearing voice-to-text software) once translated “people will hate me and be jealous” to “they’ll hang out at my Meme Beach House“. It’s just one guy.

This week’s band is by way of my playmate, once again.

Out of context. But what isn’t?

The Leaping Croutons.

They’re loud and bouncy.

Though, of course, as you might have already guessed…. it’s really just one guy.

Hallo Hallo! I am saying Hallo Hallo. Announcement time.

Picture me wearing that crazy hat

You guys! PLUM DUFF!

It is now Plum Duff. Temporarily, at least.

Plum Duff days are the very best days. The best!

There are bonuses. There are amazing things that you normally can’t get. Things are special, sparkly and beautiful. And sweet.

The story and the Very Great Things are on the plum duff page, which needs a PASSWORD and the password is heaveaway but I am also going to put it below, like so:


That’s it for me …

Join my Friday ritual in the comments if you feel like it. Or call silent retreat!

We let people have their own experience. We’re supportive and welcoming. And we don’t give advice (unless people specifically ask for it).

Wishing you a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious day, a restful weekend and a happy week to come.

Shabbat shalom.

p.s. It’s fine if it’s not Friday anymore. There’s complete chicken amnesty — join in whenever (or not) and it’s no big deal.